BeeCrest
05-27-2006, 08:12 PM
Beginning revised so I have more room for changes.
Here's what I have so far, I don't like the 2nd paragraph >.>
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Alya pressed for her horse to go faster as she rode out from the woods. Exile was the only thing she could think of to escape the Gaen realm.She didn't want to live in peace forever and be fawned over as the Matriarch's daughter. Most of all, Alya wanted to escape one last time to fufill love she found on her own.
After an hour of galloping Alya stopped at a stream to let the horse rest. It drank heavily as if the steed knew they had a long journey ahead of them. Soon after Alya continued her ride to the human kingdom Janan where she waited to meet the man she loved. Over the course of two years she and Haru met in secret as she travelled with her mother to Janan. Haru, a knight who served under King Jayanth, accompanied the king one morning during the welcoming of the Matriarch. While everyone watched in awe as the leader of the Gaen's rode into the courtyard Haru simply gazed at the maiden riding in shortly after her mother's grand entrance. Later that night during the feast he talked with the maiden allowing love to blind him. Haru never considered the fact that he might never see her agian, how he could live with someone shunned in his society, or of what life she had waiting in the Gaen realm.
Here's what I have so far, I don't like the 2nd paragraph >.>
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Alya pressed for her horse to go faster as she rode out from the woods. Exile was the only thing she could think of to escape the Gaen realm.She didn't want to live in peace forever and be fawned over as the Matriarch's daughter. Most of all, Alya wanted to escape one last time to fufill love she found on her own.
After an hour of galloping Alya stopped at a stream to let the horse rest. It drank heavily as if the steed knew they had a long journey ahead of them. Soon after Alya continued her ride to the human kingdom Janan where she waited to meet the man she loved. Over the course of two years she and Haru met in secret as she travelled with her mother to Janan. Haru, a knight who served under King Jayanth, accompanied the king one morning during the welcoming of the Matriarch. While everyone watched in awe as the leader of the Gaen's rode into the courtyard Haru simply gazed at the maiden riding in shortly after her mother's grand entrance. Later that night during the feast he talked with the maiden allowing love to blind him. Haru never considered the fact that he might never see her agian, how he could live with someone shunned in his society, or of what life she had waiting in the Gaen realm.