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blah
08-04-2006, 09:46 PM
I'll post my short funny fanfic for you to laugh till you pee your pants and contribute with something funny, too.

I hope.

What's your "Gun"pakotu?

Ever wonder what would the different zanpakotus in bleach look like as a gun?
Let's pretend that I went there and asked them to convert their swords to guns. Let's enjoy the shinigami shenanigans!

Me: Hi there vice-captain Abarai Renji. What's your gunpakotu?

Renji: I'm glad you asked, blah. It is a MASSIVE, POWERFUL, SAWED-OFF SHOTGUN! Say hello to....ZABIMARU!

Ichigo (butts in): BAH! It ain't nothing like my INSANLY, BIG-ASS SHOTGUN! My Zangetsu is TWICE as strong than your Zabimaru!
Renji: Oh, yeah? In its released form, it's FIVE times stronger than your toothpick of a sword!
Ichigo: I've released my Zangetsu, which makes your Monkey Frankenstien TEN times weaker than my old man!
Renji: TOO BAD! Zabimaru is now FIFTY times stronger than your Drug addict!

Zangetsu (thinking): Drug addict?

Ichigo: HA! A crack-head Zangetsu is a HUNDERED times stronger than your poop-thrower!
Renji:This Poop-thrower is a THOUSAND....

Me:... er....moving along. Hey! It's captain Kuchiki Byakuya! What's your gunpakotu?

Byakuya: It is an elegant Pistolet d'ordonance de la Marine française (French Navy Pistol). It suits my aristocratic personality well.

Ichigo(butts in, again): HA! you call that a gun? It's such a girly-girl gun. It could never match themanliness of my awesome Zangetsu.

Renji(stifles laughter): Really, captain? It does look ......ridiculous.

Ichigo: What did ya expect, Renji? I always knew he was gay, ever since I saw his funky hair thingy.

Byakuya: It's called a headpiece, simpelton. And as for your manliness...(Aims low and fires at Ichigo and Renji)

Ichigo: AAAAAARGH! MY MANLINESS!!!
Renji:YAAARRGGHH! HOW WILL I HAVE CHILDREN NOW?!?!?

ME: Ewwww.... I think I'll be leaving now. (At the Eleventh division lodge) Hey! Madarame Ikkaku! What's happening Baldy?

(Ikkaku pulls a sniper rifle and shoves it in my face)

Ikkaku (Clint Eastwood-esque); You talkin' to me, punk? I'm clearly not bald, so I'll assume you're either blind or stupid.

Me: S-sorry, S-sir! H-hey, is that your gunpakotu?

Ikkaku (excited): Yo, check it! It's a sniper rifle, but if you take this and put it here and here and there! VOILA! Three different guns! Cool, huh?

Me: Wow, nice! But how do you hold the third one?

Ikkaku:.................................GAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!! I knew there was something wrong! That bastard Kurosutchi ripped me off!
Me: What do you mean?
Ikkaku: Didn't you know? He invented the device that changes our zanpakotu into gunpakotu.
ME: Really? I should have a talk with him. Bye, baldy!

Ikkaku:I'M NOT BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALD! :angry:

(A short walk to the neighboring 12th division lodge)

Me: Hi, Captain Kurotsuchi! How did.....

Kurotsuchi: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! GET OFF MY BACK!!
(Then he shot two darts from his blow-dart gun :eek13: , which paralyzed me, and ran away laughing like a retarded Hyena.

BASTARD!)

(As I lay helplessly to the side of the road, The great commander Shigekuni Yamamoto-Genryusai walked by!)

Me: SWEET GOD! It's Commander Shigekuni Yamamoto-Genryusai!!! It's an honour, sir! Even though I can't move an inch, I must ask you: What's your gunpakotu?

Yamamoto: My gunpakotu?(laughs) You really want to see it?(laughs louder)ALL RIGHT!!!(Creepy laugh) You asked for it!!(Laughs maniacally as he pulls out a flame thrower from his uniform!) TURN THEM ALL TO ASH, MOFO!!!! Nyahahahhaahhahhahahaha

(Then he torched everything around me as he laughed like the pyromaniac he is.)

Me: *sigh* At least I'm paralyzed, so I won't feel a thing.

(I saw that bastard Kurotsuchi running to me.)
Kurotsuchi: *Huff huff* Nope! You can still feel pain, you just can't move. *wheeeze*

(Runs away laughing)

Me:...

EnD?

Evanesque
08-29-2006, 11:49 AM
Uh...I don't know what to say...It's kinda funny but...uh..*trails off*