Question my heart

[layla]

Stirred around (emotions dont die)
caught in a whirlpool of the past,
I cant seem to escape this time
or maybe i was never able...

It seems like everytime i look back
through the fog
I can still see fragments in memory,
Your words seem to echo, and somehow
I was still hoping you'll come through.

"I tried to hold on, but you were oblivious,"
in the end, I refuse to believe
that this is the last
no more regret,
this is my decision
I've created this past.

Mixed feelings
Undefined emotions
Let this be the last time
In which i question my heart.

August 12, 2006


this is crap, but i wrote it in the spur of the moment =/

[iladys]

Heya shiz. Mm, not the most edited work duh but I get what you're trying to make come across so nice.

[MasterWordSmith]

I can tell it was spur of the moment, but the piece definately has it's gems.

Your words seem to echo, and somehow
I was still hoping you'll come through.
this rings very nicely and sets a good tonal quality on which the basis of your piece seems to rest.
Stirred around (emotions dont die)
I like how the aside is almost pretentions, like you KNOW what emotions do, as if you've been there and done that.

[Sanzora]

I quite enjoyed the feel you were trying to achieve... I hear what you're saying but yeah it is a little offish. Nice poem though