Crimson Stain

[Kooy]

Crimson Stain

Wars wage on between humans and vampires only to see the crimson stain that is left behind after the battle is over. Wars happened from human to human, human to vampire, vampire to vampire but they left with one result, the extinction of the attacking party which waged war with its own political ideals for a nation that has an “absolute” method to live. Humans are creatures with their own self at stake not at the stake of others. They make say they are fighting for their country, but they’ve become dogs on which the people who wage them around like puppets, sit at the sideline and wait for it to end in their favor. The so called “puppeteers” run endlessly to make you bark like a dog for themselves, which in fact makes them feel superior, when they are only cowards. Of course, with out these cowards, the human could have never established such a profound way to restrain the ideal of rebellion. Without them, humans could not be existing at this moment. Vampires are the same way. The group of vampires known as “Elder Bloodlines” also make puppets of their followers. They used their knowledge of psychology to persuade the vampire nation to fall under their wing. Of course that wing is thick with lies and cannot support all those lies.

I am also what you call a “Elder Bloodline.” I did not like their way of making our kin bark like dogs when ordered to. I decided to leave with my head still intact. Once your were considered a elder bloodline, you can’t leave so easily. I found that out the hard way when they killed my lover, a human who had high status in the human society to make vampires and humans co-exist. The Elder bloodline thought it was killing 2 birds with one stone. They could get rid of my lover, a human, and make me pay a price for leaving. I swore revenge, that I would cut the elder bloodlines heads off without any mercy, reclaim myself as a elder bloodline, and lead the vampire kin as it should be lead. Its been 20 years since I took that oath, and civilization in both the human and vampire world are in chaos. The Elder Bloodlines waged war with the humans and now I am in the neutral. I hate humans, but I also made a promise to her that I would take a human’s life.



This is jsut the opening of whats to come, the ideas for this story popped in my head while watching a horror classic(can you believe that?)

[M-50]

This is good so far? How long are you going to make it? Lot's of information though, which is good, but I do not do that yet in my story.
P.S. Like your sig.

[Kooy]

thanks for the sig compliment and yeah i will continue this story just as soon as i get home from work -.- (work suxs!)

12:27 am and just finished a chapter

Chapter 2: Who is this Woman?

Daylight has ended, humans lock up their houses while vampires roam around and “play”. Vampires begin to raid the blood banks in hospitals while other go to the Fight Arena. The Fight arena was even around back 20 years ago. Vampire vs Vampire all out war, no weapons, fist to fist fight till death or knockout. Of course no one is ever knocked out, vampires show no mercy towards each other. I was curious to find out the strength of the young ones today so I decided to look from the crowd. I was very surprised, you never do get to see a human fight a vampire in the fight arena, in fact she was woman. I began to stare at her, I saw how predictable her movements were, but to the vampire she was fighting, he was not smart enough to read her movements. The human killed the vampire within 5 minutes only to hear a complete silence in crowd followed by the utter whining of losing a bet. I was stunned, in the 800 years have I lived, I have never, ever seen a human fight so brilliantly! I wanted to fight her, she made my blood boil inside myself, I told myself to calm down, but it was no use. I approached her from behind only to see her reflex and hit me in the face. “My, my you have a lovely punch miss, care to take me on?” I responded. She looked at the crowd, the crowd was enthusiastic about the fight. They hated the human woman, she made a complete embarrassment out of them. She looked up at me and shook her head yes to fight. The human woman got into what looked like a self-defense stance, I on the other hand, untied my sword and sheath, put it on the ground beside me and stood there open for her attack. She rushed at me with a force a human woman should not have. I blocked her punches only to see her hit me in the face with a roundhouse kick in my blind spot. I bled from my lip, and said “ Hit me all you want.” She repeatedly struck punches at my body , I could see her knuckles rip apart as she started going for my face. I was tired of sitting around waiting for her to do damage to me. “Now the fun starts!” I yelled. I dodged the first of her punches and blocked the others only to see a haymaker being thrown. I dodged the haymaker and countered instantly to the woman’s face. I was enjoying this, I haven’t felt this good in 20 years. My blood was boiling more, I needed to feed. Then it hit me, as she was laying on the floor knocked out, blood everywhere, vampires gazing looking to drink the blood, I lost my desire to feed. I walked over to the knocked out woman’s body picked her up from the ground. I went over to my sword, also picked that up and the crowd was starting to get angry. “Put the woman back you ingrate! No mercy! She is now our prey leave her with us!” the crowded yelled. The crowd of vampires started to charge at me, I unsheathed my sword, killed every vampire that attacked me. I was excited, a massacre lay before me and my blood is boiling. My thirst for the woman came back only to be restricted by the promise I made. I decided to take the woman with me.

[M-50]

Good. It is interesting.

[BWoods]

Neat story you have here, the first chapter seemed to be more of an introduction than anything, but it lays important groundwork. It feels a little fast paced, not a lot of detail put into each scene, not the way I would write it but everyone has their own style. If you continue with the story I'll check it out, the main character seems to be a little deeper than I initially thought.

If you would be kind enough please check out my newest story I began writing about a week ago (though it's been in the planning stages for nearly two months.) It's named "Chance."