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View Full Version : A night in the Urahara House (R)


Helikaon
02-11-2007, 05:36 AM
The silent night in the Urahara house was only broken by the slightest sound of two figures rising from the beds in which they could find no rest. Neither knew the presence of the other until a turn of events had them bump into each other in one of the four corners of the house.


“Ich..Ich…Ichigo” Rukia stuttered in surprise at the appearance of his dark face that was only illuminated by the light of the moon filtering through the window.


“Oh! Rukia, its you” Ichigo said half heartedly.



They stared at each other for a while, listening to the breeze lightly knocking on the doors and windows of the house.


What is this? What is “oh its you?” Were you expecting someone else? Why does your face always reflect inner pain? And why can I never pull my eyes away from your glance… That sad look.


“Why are you up now Ichigo?” Rukia asked, trying to hide her concern.


“I can’t sleep…” Ichigo sighed, his eyes wandering the house not wanting to be pulled in by her gaze again.


Rukia could feel the tension that grew between them, like it would snap under any weight. She made an effort to pull herself together and ask the question that plagued her mind over these few days in the Urahara house.


“What’s wrong Ichigo? All I see now is you looking at me with those sad eyes. Where did the Ichigo I know fall along the way? Who are you?” Rukia’s voice cracked at the last question. The emotion flowing in. She felt the tears welling up inside her and she couldn’t control them. The tears flowed freely down her face.


Yet Ichigo made no move to comfort her. Instead he answered the question, his eyes looking off through the wall into the distance.


“Why me?” he stated, it was as if the world hung on his words, wanting to hear his answer. The wind stopped outside.


“I always have the weight of the world on my shoulders, like my legs will buckle under the pressure. Whenever it seems that I’ve caught up to the pressure, another replaces it, even heavier than before.”


As Rukia stared at him while he was speaking a voice screamed inside her.


Since when did Ichigo tell me how he feels? Now it’s harder than ever to look the other way and pretend that I don’t care . His face… Oh his face…


“Some times I can’t take it anymore, I just want to fall down and not get up. Just lie there and…” He didn’t finish his sentence, because before he could say it, Rukia’s hands reached up and cupped his face, as she did this she pulled him into a kiss that neither would ever forget. Like the world didn’t matter anymore, all that mattered was this night and the moon reflecting off his eyes.


“Why do you always hide it Ichigo?” Rukia said after the embrace. “Why do you always take the weight on your own? Do you even see me before you? You… You saved me when the world had lost hope, you, you were there for me. You know, you have friends that would help you. Look at Chad, Inoue, and Ishida. They went to hell and back, and now you ignore them. But I won’t let you ignore me… I just wont.”


This time it was Ichigo that reached down and pulled her face to his, in that sweet surrender, she could have stayed in it all night.



But her body had other ideas. Before she could control herself she was moving towards her room, her face was flushed and started to heat up. She became entranced by his lips on hers, the smooth texture brushing up against her own. His hands moving over her body like he was creating the most beautiful sculpture, they seemed to flow over her curves, removing her clothing like it was nothing at all. His fingers moved over her breasts feeling them like they were the most delicate thing in the world, his fingers brushed over her nipple and she let out a silent cry.


Her body seemed to have a mind of its own for she was twisting with every move of his hands. The ecstasy ran through her body like nothing before, she felt more alive than ever. She knew this was her time, she knew what he was to do. She felt him enter her and the heat of the moment, the energy erupted into a new level, as their bodies swayed in time.


The beauty of his body portrayed along side hers in the moonlight, time could have stopped. She felt her inner body reaching new levels and she filled with the ecstasy inside of her, she exploded in the pleasure of the moment letting herself go. For once in her life she felt free. The moment lasted a second. After that they lay beside each other in the bliss of the morning light.


Rukia broke the silence with a question that she knew the answer to.


“This… This won’t happen again will it?” Rukia asked in an awkward manner.

Ichigo got that far off look again.

“Not until it’s over… Not until everything ends, not until I do what I was born to do”

Evanesque
02-11-2007, 06:03 AM
She felt him enter her and the heat of the moment, the energy erupted into a new level, as there bodies swayed in time.

As their bodies swayed in time.

Nice story ice but do you think it's okie for the kiddies here to read that? XD

Helikaon
02-11-2007, 07:31 AM
thats why it has a rating (R)... as in 18+

oops and thanks for pointing out my grammar mistake

*Ririn*
02-12-2007, 06:52 PM
Woahhh...i never imagined that happening..hehe nice one ice

Helikaon
02-13-2007, 07:22 AM
Thanks :) Now all I need is more people to read it hahaha

*Ririn*
02-15-2007, 03:45 PM
haha trust me many have read it but they'r just too chicken to comment in here..

Helikaon
02-15-2007, 07:26 PM
sad :( I was hoping to get some feedback.

BabyLoving
02-16-2007, 03:20 PM
BBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOO!!!!!Just commenting so to prove that I'M NOT TOO CHICKEN!!!!! LOL. (: Anyway, great work, but I seriously hope that it is not going to be all this type of scenes and nothing else at all. Hope you give us some twists too. LOL.(: I'm such a hard customer. LOL.(:

*Ririn*
02-18-2007, 06:13 PM
yay my plan worked...^^ im happy...more people will hopefully comment but you know not many come around here but cross your fingers >.>

Joe Black
02-19-2007, 01:38 AM
Sometimes, I browse through the other work that is submitted here, and I must say that the title really did catch my attention. (hey, can someone actaully refuse the temptation of reading something rated R?)

To be honest, it wasn't just the content provided that impressed me, but the intricate detail that enhanced the visual senses. The dialogue added to the mood of the story (which I liked), and the characters at that time were believable.

I don't know how much weight my comment is on this work, but this was truly an enjoyable read. I'll look forward to more of your work in the future.

- Joe

Mighty Aramir
02-19-2007, 02:59 AM
I read it! very good one man! excellent explanation of details, yet not beyond the point of obsecenity

Helikaon
02-19-2007, 08:23 AM
Thankyou very very much.. ive been waiting for some good comments on this and I really appriciate the time you have invested into reading this.. I really enjoy getting constructive feedback and it pleases me even more to get praise.. so in turn the more I get.. the more ill be likely to write another fanfic.

Toutaku Chuuei
03-02-2007, 05:54 PM
Beautiful Fanfic, I loved you attention to details. it was one of the best fanfics i have ever read. it is awsome

Kay™
03-02-2007, 06:23 PM
it is really interesting and i like it, nice work ice:)

Sakuya
03-03-2007, 10:07 PM
Woah thar man.

Totally what I expected from R-rated. It's rarely ever intense violence, so sex is basically the only other option.

Haha. This was totally the first Bleach fan fiction I've ever read --I'm more of the Harry Potter type (Beta reader for random HP kids). Overall, I thought it was pretty good, definitely above the usual, "Oh, hey guys can you read this? I wrote it just now, in ten minutes and didn't use spell check, so there are probably loads of grammar/spelling problems, but you don't mind do you?" that you get with forum fics so often. Hate that.

Anyway, like mentioned above, your attention to detail definitely enhanced the writing and overall feel of the story. I thought the ending was Spiderman-esque, relating back to the whole "with great power comes great responsibility" thing, which I mean as something good. Hmm. I liked your use of dialogue here too. :]

I don’t care . His face…
Erm... I know this is lame, but I catch the stupid little things. There's an extra space before that period.


Rukia broke the silence with a question that she knew the answer to.
“This… This won’t happen again will it?” Rukia asked in an awkward manner.
Is the "Rukia asked in an awkward manner" bit necessary there? Personally, I feel that it breaks the flow of the end portion. Because otherwise, it'd be her question, then his answer. Bam, bam, dead.... sort of leaves the reader with even more? But that's just me.

"sweet surrender"
Favorite part, yo.

Anyway, hope this helps, but if it doesn't, just ignore it.

Kalashnikov
03-03-2007, 11:41 PM
Ice! - ive already told you how awesome this fic is =) since i got to see your work before everyone else =P

its excellent, i loved reading it, this was my second time and i still loved it.