Sidewalk

[BeeCrest]

The sidewalk wasn't
going to crumble
for some time,
so I approached steps
growing into a house.

Earth to each side
was dry of my
bodily fluids that had
evaporated long ago
without my permission.

The porch plants;
cold and weedy.
A neglected bike;
choked with rusty dust.
And the front door,

a chipped, wooden slab
that donned a sign.
It lacked the worth
required, for it
read: Welcome Home.

To be fair
I knocked anyways
while holding nostalgia
by it's tiny throat
along with my breath.

-----

Doubt I'll revise Part Two any time soon. I really don't like it. (Part Two that is. I'm ok with this first part).

[Isis]

You're always one with interesting imagery, Bee. I really liked how you personified nostalgia ^^

[Ai]

Its a nice piece indeed Crest..However the flow for me is hard to capture due to the way you've set it up..I think I see why you've set it up why you did to make it appear more in the way of stanza operated however I think it would have made the flow a lot easier to grasp if it had been laid out something like this.

The sidewalk wasn't going to crumble for some time,
so I approached those steps growing into the house.

Added a little modification as well :p..

Anyhow I feel that you sacrificed your flow for layout in this piece but still a very nice one to read.

[BeeCrest]

You're always one with interesting imagery, Bee. I really liked how you personified nostalgia ^^

Thanks (: And good to know it's still interesting XD

Its a nice piece indeed Crest..However the flow for me is hard to capture due to the way you've set it up..I think I see why you've set it up why you did to make it appear more in the way of stanza operated however I think it would have made the flow a lot easier to grasp if it had been laid out something like this.



Added a little modification as well :p..

Anyhow I feel that you sacrificed your flow for layout in this piece but still a very nice one to read.

/me likes the weird structure in this piece, oddly enough

I didn't even plan to use it until I noticed the number of words in each line. I then went from there.