glass cage

[zen]

the sun hot as fire
magnified 100x over
beating on my back
scars of regret show
But this cage is protecting me
from the outside
I'd rather take this pain
than try to cope with my life
I'm a coward in every since of the world
sticking my dinging hand in and out
to take little refreshments
people stare point and laugh
but the glow from this cage
has burnt my eyes
rather
my true vision
i no longer see the beauty I hold
only a blur of my ambitions in the reflection.
______________
I feel really good about this one comment please!

[Sin]

Hmmmm... It feels a little all over the place. At first it gave the impression of a slave then a homeless person or at least someone who has failed.

[zen]

thats the point of it

[grim-jow]

ha cuz your such an emo, it's good though, I do agree with the other guy it's all over the place.

[Ai]

A weird piece which portrays the feelings which you have..However the ending is definitely the better part of this piece if you could work on the beginning and the flow you set up then you'll find your pieces a lot better for me individually but apart from that a very nice piece.