12 Hilarious Geek Quotes

[Jasper]

LOL! I was browsing another forum and happened to come across this title... Here's a list of geeky quotes that are pretty funny if you understand what they mean :p, Obtained from : http://arloo.blogspot.com/2005/10/best-and-most-hilarious-geek-quotes.html


There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
-Unknown

If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0
-T-Shirt

I'm not anti-social; I'm just not user friendly
-T-Shirt

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
-Unknown

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
-Unknown

Microsoft: "You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips."

I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code
- Unknown

Roses are #FF0000; Violets are #0000FF;
All my base; Are belong to you
- someone at slashdot

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt

The box said 'Requires Windows 95 or better'. So I installed LINUX.
- Unknown

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown

In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
- unknown

For those of you who didn't get the 1st joke, 2 in binary digits is expressed as 10...

[Ujio]

lol i like these *thumbs up*

[Raku]

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown




ROFLMAO!!! XD SO TRUE!!

[Jasper]

I like the "I'm not anti-social, I'm just not user friendly" the most... Kinda makes you think of people like programs or something... LOL

[Cleric]

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt

I want that t-shirt ^_^ V,,

but really your mind dosn't read every letter in a word anyway >_<

[Thing]

lol, atfirst I couldn't read it, I'm no expert in 1337 speech

Funny one that LINUX one...

[Bregandaerthe]

Those are so funny. Most of them are so true, lol.

[drifter]

omg the "The box said 'Requires Windows 95 or better'. So I installed LINUX." sooo funny!

[Xferox 02]

wow thats geeky

[Evanesque]

Oh sheesh to geeky for me...but damn I'm surprised I could read the l33t one XD

[*Ririn*]

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown

loved this one the best...XD

[Kalashnikov]

hehe - i actually found those really funny - since im a programmer and i know binary and all -

i must be one geeky bastard to know that stuff. LOL

[Evanesque]

^^ XD ^^

*pats Ali*

[Toasty]

that made my day! thanks! I've seen the first one before, priceless.

[obvious troll]

I lol'd @
Microsoft: "You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips."

[♥ Tess]

rofl! those are hilarious >x

[Rayster]

I liked the first one the first time i heard it, last year some time. quite clever

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown
my Lecturer actually showed us that one!! XD

[M_A]

Roses are #FF0000; Violets are #0000FF;
All my base; Are belong to you
- someone at slashdot

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt


ROFLMFAO!
These are awesom, and so true as well. good job finding them.

[Jeem]

Haha, all your base are belong to us...I remember seeing something on that game one time.

Very funny stuff :D

[Xferox 02]

the proper geek language

[Kay™]

If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0
-T-Shirt
rofl so true:D

[DireCry]

Haha these are aweomse.

[Anubisrage]

My favourite ones were:

I'm not anti-social; I'm just not user friendly
-T-Shirt

Microsoft: "You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips."

I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code
- Unknown

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown

[pero_renji!]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Roses are #FF0000; Violets are #0000FF;
All my base; Are belong to you
- someone at slashdot
ROFL :D:D:D:D
goddamit :D

[Pie <3]

Roses are #FF0000; Violets are #0000FF;
All my base; Are belong to you
- someone at slashdot

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt

The box said 'Requires Windows 95 or better'. So I installed LINUX.
- Unknown




LMFAO.
Those are so good.

[Miyata]

These are hilarious. Nice find Z :).

[Phasmatis]

To add to the list (and you know can!)...
Login: yes
Password: i dont have one
password is incorrect
Login: yes
Password: incorrect
"I can only imagine the deprivation and loneliness you will feel from a lack of human companionship when your 1000 free AOL hours run out."
"You know you're a geek when... You try to shoo a fly away from the monitor with your cursor. That just happened to me. It was scary."
Men think that computers should be referred to as female, just like ships, because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2. The language in which they communicate among themselves is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. The message "Bad command or File Name" is about as informative as "if you don't know why I'm mad at you, I'm certainly not going to tell you !"
4. Your smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for later retrieval.
5. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you spend half your paycheck on accessories for it.
6. Miss a period and they go wild.
7. You do the same thing for years, and suddenly it's wrong.
Women think computers are male because:
1. They have lots of data, but are still clueless.
2. They are supposed to solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
3. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had only waited a bit longer, you could have had a better model.
4. To get their attention, you have to "turn them on".
5. A big "power-surge" will knock them out for the rest of the night !
6. It is always necessary to have a backup.
7. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
8. Size does matter.

[eyedea23]

hahahahaha

[EnzJon]

Spiffy find, Z_blitz. I actually got all of those. Scary, huh? O_o;;

[Papercuts]

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt


LoL this made me laugh, the other funny thing was I can read it lmao

[Ericd014]

Microsoft: "You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips."

That really should be their new slogan.....

[BabyLoving]

Yeah, I agree. Most of the stuff were hilarious. LOL. (: Maybe because I'm not a geek, so I can't understand some. (:

[Kay™]

try to be one and understand this geek joke like the 3rd one,it is really funny:D

[Donut]

I understood them... But they're kinda lame... D:

[Kefka]

These are great. I got a laugh out of them. :D

*kills the dancing paperclip*

[nevaziah]

Oh sheesh to geeky for me...but damn I'm surprised I could read the l33t one XD

took me a minute but i did read that one. made me feel depressed for a bit, but i'm not worried...

[Epyon94]

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown
Too true, too true.

If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0
-T-Shirt
Hey it's my motto.

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
-UnknownA quote to program by.

These are just great.

[Hugoinaboxlives]

There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
-Unknown

Roses are #FF0000; Violets are #0000FF;
All my base; Are belong to you
- someone at slashdot

My favourites of them...

None of my friends get the first one :(

[Icchy <3]

The box said 'Requires Windows 95 or better'. So I installed LINUX.
- Unknown

Someone save mee... I can't stop laughing *Wipes tear away*

[Miss M]

There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
-Unknown

I'm not anti-social; I'm just not user friendly
-T-Shirt

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown

In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
- unknown



peeves!! xD
I couldn't understand the others... xD
woOh!! I understood the l33t one!!
erm...that's good... right? >_>''

[SakuraNeko]

Those are funny ... I understood the first one cause in my mind I saw 2 not the number 10 and the leet one well that was easy to understand.


Yes I know I am a geek.

[Miyagi Rikku]

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt

xD Rofl

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown

aye aye so true xD

[Syph]

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt

XD Hilarious.

[slave_car]

i loove nerd jokes... so here's one:
a wife says to her husband (a programmer) : "GO TO the shop and buy a loaf of bread IF there is milk in the shop buy 5..."
the husband returnes with 5 loafs of bread and the wife goes: "Wtf?"
so he answers:" there was milk..."
in case u dont get it it's a bit QBasic, pascal 'n' shit :D

[SageOfHalo]

Since we're talking programming humor, I'd like to add this little gem I picked up a few years ago... If you're a Beatles fan and know the song, feel free to sing along:

WRITE IN C (sung to the tune of The Beatles' "Let it Be")
----------------------------------------------------------------------

When I find my code in tons of trouble,
Friends and colleagues come to me,
Speaking words of wisdom:
"Write in C."

As the deadline fast approaches,
And bugs are all that I can see,
Somewhere, someone whispers"
"Write in C."

Write in C, write in C,
Write in C, write in C.
LISP is dead and buried,
Write in C.

I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,
for science it worked flawlessly.
Try using it for graphics!
Write in C.

If you've just spent nearly 30 hours
Debugging some assembly,
Soon you will be glad to
Write in C.

Write in C, write in C,
Write In C, yeah, write in C.
Only wimps use BASIC.
Write in C.

Write in C, write in C,
Write in C, oh, write in C.
Pascal won't quite cut it.
Write in C.

{ Guitar Solo }

Write in C, write in C,
Write in C, yeah, write in C.
Don't even mention COBOL.
Write in C.

And when the screen is fuzzy,
And the editor is bugging me.
I'm sick of ones and zeroes.
Write in C.

A thousand people swear by T.P.
Seven is the one for me.
I hate the word PROCEDURE,
Write in C.

Write in C, write in C,
Write in C, yeah, write in C.
PL1 is 80's,
Write in C.

Write in C, write in C,
Write in C, yeah, write in C.
The government loves ADA,
Write in C.

[.Rik-uh-shey]

Roses are #FF0000; Violets are #0000FF;
All my base; Are belong to you
- someone at slashdot




lmao. that game was God's only mistake

[DespoticWalnut]

Hey, I can read it and I get "The Sex".

[Monkey_man]

here is my fav

chugh SoH vam Hov (basiclly reads if you ca read this stop watching start trek)

[Lady Matsu]

took me a while before I could read this:

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
- tee shirt

then I had to laugh. So I read this one aloud to my dad:

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
- Unknown

and he laughed. :lol:

[Caesar]

-We have to stop meeting girls that their names end with .jpg
-Unknown

or sth like that.. i read it somewhere..

[Xkavanger]

Microsoft: "You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips."
and damn those stupid paperclips xD


Nice find Litzy =D
These are great xDD
Made me laugh haha

[Monkey_man]

i have a lvl 70 dwarf paladin Microsoft has dancing paper clips who would in pvp

[ɯɐpɐ]

Oh, that's my quote. XD

[II Xion II]

The first quote was classic. I got it from the offset, but I still found it incredibly clever. Speaking of clever, I just used the term "offset."

[-=Yanayo=-]

brilliant