Relationship Thread

[strydr]

hey everyone, long time no message from me.
My relationship is all good, my gf and I are getting along well and are accelerating at a steady pace, which is what i wanted... just a prblem that came up today.
Today, the 28th of February, is "our" 3 month anniversary - Yeah! - just that i really wanted to see her, so i told my mom, not my dad (cause the dad is kinda uptight about the whole relationship thing - says,"In MY time there was no such thing as dating (cough, cough)" and also denying the fact that my Girlfriend is actually my Girlfriend (OMG),so i dont consult with the father figure). My mom just put her face down and went on with her day, saying things like, "We'll see, ok". So the day went pass and nothing happened. i phoned the gf to try to find out what is happening on her side of the world. so she calls me just before sunset to say that i can come and that her mom will gladly drop me at home later... then my mom and dad just said that they were tired... which is not even a proper reason - you guys should know that parents make some stupid comments just to get away with a situation, then when you come with a counter then they have a new or improved reason.
So i told them that my uncle was willing to take me, then it was something else AGAIN! FOOK!!
what i discovered for the 4th time, is that parents control your transport, until you can drive you have to abide to their rules and if they in a bad mood then you must also be in a bad mood... DAMN!
What do i do, i really wanted to see my gf today, tonight. the gf doesnt sound disappointed, then it seems that she has something better to do... lol.
Now, i seem depressed but i am just so godDamn irritated with this whole situation. I just wanna cut a tree down
I need a romance/ relationship psychologist urgently !! PLZ help my fellow bleachers . :(

wondering if anymore bleachers can help.

thanx a lot Draga, but she has no internet, so no skype, and the walk to her house is kinda dangerous... quite very! if you dont know much about South Africa, where i live, then you have to research to find out our crime rate.

[strydr]

help??
check above replies from me, plz guys...

[dragoneyes001]

the problem i see has to do with not comunicating with your father even if he's hell bent on not admiting shes your girlfriend the better you make your ability to talk to each other the more frequently he'll be willing to if nothing else allow you to do stuff.

dont worry too much about the three month day its not that important when next you meet up give her the belated present she's well aware that you couldnt make it do to outside(family) reasons dont dwell on that.

besides absence makes the heart grow fonder!

by the way what part of south africa i was there about 25 years ago beautiful country we spent a month there a week in kruger alone!

[K.Ogawa]

[QUOTE=dragoneyes001]absence makes the heart grow fonder!
\QUOTE]

heh, my mother quoted that to me a while back...

[strydr]

the problem i see has to do with not comunicating with your father even if he's hell bent on not admiting shes your girlfriend the better you make your ability to talk to each other the more frequently he'll be willing to if nothing else allow you to do stuff.
dont worry too much about the three month day its not that important when next you meet up give her the belated present she's well aware that you couldnt make it do to outside(family) reasons dont dwell on that.
besides absence makes the heart grow fonder!
by the way what part of south africa i was there about 25 years ago beautiful country we spent a month there a week in kruger alone!

wow! 25 years ago, nelson mandela wasnt even out of prison damn!
anyway i live in Cape Town, and you probably mean Kruger National Park??

thanx for da advice, absence does make the heart grow fonder... i know dat by now.

[strydr]

wow! today was really nice, i got to meet a lot of my girlfriend's friends, nice to bond and make jokes with her people, but i want to know, maybe from the girl bleachers, but guys help if you can.
if i hugged and held my girlfriend tight on one day (when we were alone) and then around her friends i dont do the same, would you feel as if something went wrong or something went backwards... kinda like you guys kiss but then the next date you dont kiss... would it feel as if something is missing???

[dragoneyes001]

wow! 25 years ago, nelson mandela wasnt even out of prison damn!
anyway i live in Cape Town, and you probably mean Kruger National Park??
thanx for da advice, absence does make the heart grow fonder... i know dat by now.


ya meant national park! its amazing how big ass trees are knocked over by elephants too lazy or stubborn to go around lol.

but Cape Town was beautiful do you ever go up table mountain? and do the Rock Rabbits still hang there? cute little vermin guess their a bit touristy.

as for your next post:

its not unusual that private displays of affection may be less prominent in public settings but this is where you need a bit of affinity to see what your partner is transmitting with her body language! theres no real rime or reason to it if she seemed happy at the time it may be she decided to keep it a bit less close first time around her friends! just dont ignore the obvious signs of her wanting you closer.

[strydr]

cool, thanx. ya i have been up the mountain a few times, and this rabbits also known as klip dassies are still hanging around there, but there was a huge fire recently, so i dunno if the population dropped.

I wanted to ask another question...
Is there something missing when you and your gf cant be close, as in naturally... for example yesterday, when we went to the bathroom (one entrance seperate rooms) i came out first and i was just standing there waiting for her... but now i am thinking why didnt i just hug her as she came out of the bathroom, if it is so hard to be physical with someone you love naturally, then does it mean something bad or does it mean that you dont have chemistry with the person.
I dont say that i dont want to be physical with her, this person whom i enjoy spending my time with, i really want to get close to her, but i am firstly not courageous enough for some reason - (does that mean anything??) - secondly, we have only been alone ALONE twice (in my books) and on both occasions i took a step further into the physical part of the relationship, does it mean something if i dont want to show my love for her when we not alone... or is it me just being decent.
I am so confused, really... and i dont know why.
I didnt even hug her yesterday, the closest physical part i came to was putting my hands on her shoulders... which is totally weak of me.
Plz - teach me 'courage'... and where the hell are the bleachers, nobody has been here for a week... whats going on???

[Marke]

Ok girls, here i am a soldier for you resuce.

[dragoneyes001]

cool, thanx. ya i have been up the mountain a few times, and this rabbits also known as klip dassies are still hanging around there, but there was a huge fire recently, so i dunno if the population dropped.

I wanted to ask another question...
Is there something missing when you and your gf cant be close, as in naturally... for example yesterday, when we went to the bathroom (one entrance seperate rooms) i came out first and i was just standing there waiting for her... but now i am thinking why didnt i just hug her as she came out of the bathroom, if it is so hard to be physical with someone you love naturally, then does it mean something bad or does it mean that you dont have chemistry with the person.
I dont say that i dont want to be physical with her, this person whom i enjoy spending my time with, i really want to get close to her, but i am firstly not courageous enough for some reason - (does that mean anything??) - secondly, we have only been alone ALONE twice (in my books) and on both occasions i took a step further into the physical part of the relationship, does it mean something if i dont want to show my love for her when we not alone... or is it me just being decent.
I am so confused, really... and i dont know why.
I didnt even hug her yesterday, the closest physical part i came to was putting my hands on her shoulders... which is totally weak of me.
Plz - teach me 'courage'... and where the hell are the bleachers, nobody has been here for a week... whats going on???

do you really think it was necessary to hug her as she exits a lavatory?

its kind of hard to tell from posts if you two have chemistry and shouldn't be commented on by us simply because we aren't there to see you two!

courage comes from communication with her the more you know about her the easier decisions become dont assume she likes or dislikes stuff without talking to her! but as far as a hug goes its not too hard to ask her to sit next to you so you can put your arm around her because you enjoy her closeness. at the very least let her know you like to be close when its possible!

as for the best way to talk things out you should ask some of the women who post here since they will have different views than I would of whats less embarrassing or over the top.

[Ios]

to strydr
well, I think there isn't much chemistry IMO but what isn't could come, right? (dutch saying). I'd say you should arrange more moments alone with her, so you get a little more used to the tension or take it away so that you'll eventually dare to do more things.

[WizKid77]

Alright, I'm back again... This time with some pretty crappy news :sadd:...
Things were excellent with the girl. She broke up with her boyfriend, we got closer together. Got a lot more affectionate to each other. Yesterday, right about to ask her out. Like right before my lips even opened to speak, she tells me all the reasons she can't go out with me. We had a lonnng conversation after that about that. This conversation was around 1-2 hours long. But in the end really nothing good came from it, except I didn't feel as bad (and I was kind of devastated beforehand not goin to lie). But yeah... she cheered me out of that state while we were talking (which is good since there's no more room on my arm)...

So yeah. You guys were kind of right, it just seems like she was playing me again. Ah well. So yeah who knows what to do now... Thanks for all your help anyway guys.

[strydr]

WizKid - dont worry, you were on the one side of this hill, that's where your dreams with the girl lies, but now that you have reached the other side, you have finally arrived at McD's; then it pops up in your head, OMG i was on the rural side of the damn village, maybe now i can find some decent girls... :).

Anyway, wanting to know what chemistry is defined as, like getting along naturally with the person, like runnin and jumpin on them and they dont mind - like being really physical, or is it the way in which you guys understand each other, like a more spiritual side...

because i find it hard to be physical with her, just because its not on my mind, because we never alone, or i just dont have sexual urges, not saying that i dont find her physically attractive, she is really beautiful, so what exactly is my problem...is it chemistry???

[dragoneyes001]

chemistry is simply natural attraction to each other nothing else.

its really not explainable since it can be totally different from one couple to another.

needless to say its not something to base a relationship on its only one part of the whole having no chemistry at all will pretty much negate there being a relationship but it doesn't take some magical amount of chemistry for a relationship to flourish.

like i said above be open with her that you enjoy holding her close don't be afraid to ask her to sit next to you so you can have your arm around her because you like it when shes next to you. just don't smother her if she wants a bit of space at times. you can always tell her you really enjoy it when she has her arm around you or takes your hand in hers. if you'd rather let her decide when its apropriate.

[Ios]

mmmm I don't really agree with you dragoneyes...
I think chemistry is that you and your girlfriend get along really well. (I don't know if that means phisically or mentally, I guess that depends on the relationship)
I think you can have a relationship without many chemistry. take me for example, I had a girlfriend a while ago but we just ddn't have any good conversations, but I was sooo in love with her that I didn't really care...
but she did and that's the reason why she broke up.
I think that there wasn't really chemistry between us.

[emmasu]

well, chemistry between two people is the feeling that y like this person maybe from the first look or not but y have never talk to but y like that person and y do not know why, y just like that person

[Evenstar]

Haha...just when I was about to forget my heart problems...

*sigh* Mine's too...complicated...more like...heartbreaking really...no, I haven't broke up with my boyfriend (because I don't have one, for heaven's sake...) nor did I realize I'm 16 and still single but...well...I fell in love with a person I shouldn't have fallen into...

my bestfriend...

(read my blog for more info...)

[dragoneyes001]

Haha...just when I was about to forget my heart problems...
*sigh* Mine's too...complicated...more like...heartbreaking really...no, I haven't broke up with my boyfriend (because I don't have one, for heaven's sake...) nor did I realize I'm 16 and still single but...well...I fell in love with a person I shouldn't have fallen into...
my bestfriend...
(read my blog for more info...)


Don't you think your blog is just a bit over-dramatic? is it really the end of everything because your 16 and single? sure it may seem like your old at 16 since its the oldest you've got so far you have 16 years of history to base that on but have you thought that at 16 you haven't even managed to live 1/4 of your life yet.

at 16 what do you consider the earliest you would have started dating 13-14 maybe. so about 2 years and if you want to be married at some point when will that be at 30-35? that leaves another 17-18 years or pretty much the entire time you've been alive again without 7/8's being chewed up to being an infant.

time is the healer for heart aches.

just remember you've got about another 60 years of life to meet and go out with other guys who will be just as nice and which you will feel just as deeply in love with its just hard to look past whats right in front of you at the moment.

[Wanderweiss]

Unless you get hit by a bus, in which case you're screwed.

I live in the moment, I don't plan ahead too much, and I'm 17 and single. ;) So for all the ladies that may be in my area...the big GH is single and looking.

[Ios]

funny guy... =P

I totally agree what dragon said there.
At my school its not unusual to be 16 and nver had a boy/girl friend.
I think half of it has/had and the other half don't.

Of course it's more fun haing a girl/boy but it's not like the end of the world..

[Shinji]

funny guy... =P

I totally agree what dragon said there.
At my school its not unusual to be 16 and nver had a boy/girl friend.
I think half of it has/had and the other half don't.

Of course it's more fun haing a girl/boy but it's not like the end of the world..
Although I have a girlfriend it's the same at my school, maybe even 65% haven't.

[strydr]

To EvenStar:
Wow! interesting story, but it sounds a bit like mine...

I went to tour Malaysia 2 years ago.
I met this girl on the tour who i was completely infatuated with as soon as i laid eyes on her. Through 3 weeks of finding out who this person is, being around her and just giving a piece of my mind (cause she thought i was a bit chubby, i told her "If you are gonna look on the outside for attraction you are gonna fall short, never underestimate who i am and what i can do, because my weight means nothing.")
In the last week I really started thinkin that being with someone like this would actually be really cool, so i put her on my "To date" list... cause i thought of her as girlfriend material... only to find out that she has a boyfriend back at home.
So once i hear "boyfriend" i immediately switch off my GirlFriend radar, but i still regarded her as a friend.
Then i started to call her (i still dont know why exactly), and we started to chat regularly. Then about 2 months after that I drove myself insane just thinkin about this person and thinkin that i will never be with this person, i even cut down a tree, there is a very thin line between love and anger.
Then i suddenly came up with a plan:
I am in a one sided love situation, and i dont matter anything to her, while she matters so much to me. If i confessed to her my love NOTHING would change, according to me I would just be leave her alone and kinda act as if nothing had happened, because obviously if she regected my confession then she would want nothing to do with me. because we spoke regularly i told her that i would be writing her a 14 page letter.
The letter contained my daily routine, quotes from various poetry books, my poems, song lyrics, how i would treat my girlfriend, and finally in the last 2 pages my confession. So the letter was sent and she never said anything - SHE SAID NOTHING!!! NOTHING!! - i thought what kinda person does that to someone who loves them, OMG! that was the most horrible thing. I saw her once or twice in the month, because my sister is her friend - but i went as planned, i didnt do much, just went on with my life, and i felt so much better because i had finally gotten it off my chest. i spoke to her on the phone still (now that i dont know why), but all i know is at some point she kinda make me think again that being with her would be an amazing adventure... and eventually the same pattern happened, I SMSed her that night telling her that i cant live in this dream of thinkin that i can be with her or will ever be with her and that we ever have a chance at being a couple, and that I HAVE given up, she won the battle, and i just gave up completely... then the night after i sent the message, she calls me (this is what shocked me the most, because she never ever called ME i always called her) and tells me that i was not an asshole (what i said in the sms - saying that i was an asshole for bugging her even after she gave a signal as in she was not interested) and that it was her fault because she had not answered my letter, then she said that she felt exactly the same way about me WHOOOAAAA!! YEAAHH!! --- that was the best feeling ever,but it only lasted 2 months, because according to her i was just someone she liked but she didnt want a boyfriend, which is totally contradictory, how can you love someone o' so dearly but not be a couple... then i just became so pissed, because she didnt make any sense, cause she told me that she didnt want to hurt another guy's feelings because he was a close friend but asked her out before me, and she had said no... which obviously says something - she didnt want to go out with him... which clearly says that he was not involved with her... OR WAS HE... it just becomes this big mess, and eventually after going on our first "alone time thingie" (in my terms a date, but to her it wasnt), i got so pissed and even more angry, because she kinda wanted sent a signal that we were going to become a couple soon, cause that is what i wanted.
So i just told her that i would never speak to her for a while because that is what she wanted... then i didnt speak to her for 2 months, but her birthday was coming up... so after the two months i gave her the birthday present i bought her while i still liked her... then i kinda figured out that i still do like this person and then i asked her "Would you like to make new memories with me?? " - which ideally means that i wanted to go out with her.
So now its been 3 months that i have been going out with her, and its been unbelievably awesome, she is just the best, and they say " Good things happen to those who wait. "
I hope that my story kinda gives you some scope on your problems... since it is kinda similar, so if you were to use my plan of confessing maybe it will help him realise that he likes you too...
Tell me if you want anymore advice or if i have typed something which you are not able to understand, cause i often get that from people.
Good Luck, EvenStar.
sTrYdR.

[Shinraco]

dam strydr why dont you right a novel? jk, when reading through it it kinda reminded me of School rumble when Tenma wrote a confession an ended up with a baby size scroll but forgot to put her name on it so Karasumaru never knew who it was.

well since after all this is the relationship thread i have this friend >_> yea.. friend who like this girl which lives by me. well shes really cute an smart, we use to go to the same middle school together which was long time ago like 4 year, an well he would like to rekindle an old friendship but how would he do that? it would be kinda weird for him just to go up to her door an ask she'll probably be shock an scared an portray him as a stalker or something. my suggestion since he likes her an all is to take a romantic an classic approach by writing a secret admire letter an post on her door (kinda cheesy?) though there would be some complication if her father were to read it <_<. any suggestion guys/girls ?

[Icestorm]

well there is this good old thing called the telephone, its the best way to let things happen, i suggest he asks if she wants to 'catch up' put it in that way and she'll most likely accept, he can decide what he does from there. I doubt if they were friends she would think he was a stalker, but she might get creeped out if u write love letters.. although betrayed in the movies as something that grabs a girls heart, in most cases it just freaks them out.. or goes wrong in the middle.

[Shinraco]

the problem is actually meeting her since she probably doesn't even remember him an it would be kinda scary if she met him around her place for some convent reason. so.. what im kinda asking is how would he meet up with her without it seeming like hes stalking her?

[Icestorm]

arrange it.. on the phone

[Shinraco]

but i dont have her number . ..

[Shinigami_Josh]

WizKid77 think of it this way your lucky something like that happened to me and then she was really cold to me then supposedly i was 'stalking' her and then she told all her friends = the whole year or there abouts and i was treated like s**t for 3 years for no good reason

[strydr]

dam strydr why dont you right a novel? jk, when reading through it it kinda reminded me of School rumble when Tenma wrote a confession an ended up with a baby size scroll but forgot to put her name on it so Karasumaru never knew who it was.
well since after all this is the relationship thread i have this friend >_> yea.. friend who like this girl which lives by me. well shes really cute an smart, we use to go to the same middle school together which was long time ago like 4 year, an well he would like to rekindle an old friendship but how would he do that? it would be kinda weird for him just to go up to her door an ask she'll probably be shock an scared an portray him as a stalker or something. my suggestion since he likes her an all is to take a romantic an classic approach by writing a secret admire letter an post on her door (kinda cheesy?) though there would be some complication if her father were to read it <_<. any suggestion guys/girls ?

i could actually write a novel, since that was only half of my story...

anyway, what i think your friend should do, if he wants to be courageous, then maybe he should just ring the doorbell and ask her if she remembers him and if she wanted to catch up or something, like go for a cup of coffee and a muffin... obviously the best way is let all just happen, like she happens to be outside her house and he walks by, like "Hi, OMG, i remember you"... but then there is always a sneeky approach, like steal or somehow get their mail by 'mistake' or catch their dog running away - ie. 'lure' their dog out with some food, or just find out if she ever gets out of the house, find out where she takes walks, or just where she likes to hang out... or throw your ball into their garden, or their house... there are a gigillion different methods dude, think of some...

but i dont ever think about this sneeky things ... ya, havent done any of them... ya... none...

[Ios]

ey strydr,
that girl you were talking abut in that enourmous post is your current girl right? I was a bit confused aboiut that when I started reading...

[dragoneyes001]

dam strydr why dont you right a novel? jk, when reading through it it kinda reminded me of School rumble when Tenma wrote a confession an ended up with a baby size scroll but forgot to put her name on it so Karasumaru never knew who it was.
well since after all this is the relationship thread i have this friend >_> yea.. friend who like this girl which lives by me. well shes really cute an smart, we use to go to the same middle school together which was long time ago like 4 year, an well he would like to rekindle an old friendship but how would he do that? it would be kinda weird for him just to go up to her door an ask she'll probably be shock an scared an portray him as a stalker or something. my suggestion since he likes her an all is to take a romantic an classic approach by writing a secret admire letter an post on her door (kinda cheesy?) though there would be some complication if her father were to read it <_<. any suggestion guys/girls ?

simplest way is you match make! get both of them to a soda or coffee shop with you have a drink together talk have some fun then you find a reason to leave them there if it stands a chance they will talk and such!

[Evenstar]

Don't you think your blog is just a bit over-dramatic? is it really the end of everything because your 16 and single? sure it may seem like your old at 16 since its the oldest you've got so far you have 16 years of history to base that on but have you thought that at 16 you haven't even managed to live 1/4 of your life yet.
at 16 what do you consider the earliest you would have started dating 13-14 maybe. so about 2 years and if you want to be married at some point when will that be at 30-35? that leaves another 17-18 years or pretty much the entire time you've been alive again without 7/8's being chewed up to being an infant.
time is the healer for heart aches.
just remember you've got about another 60 years of life to meet and go out with other guys who will be just as nice and which you will feel just as deeply in love with its just hard to look past whats right in front of you at the moment.

Yeah...maybe you're right...I'm not actually considering my age as a basis for having a boyfriend...I'm not THAT worried...it's just...it's the first time I kinda felt that way...that's why for me he's kinda special...

(cause she thought i was a bit chubby, i told her "If you are gonna look on the outside for attraction you are gonna fall short, never underestimate who i am and what i can do, because my weight means nothing.") Hehe....suave there, strydr! I would have fallen for you if you told it to me like that:winking56

But seriously, it's quite inspiring indeed....you're too persistent, that's why you got her...I, on the other hand, doesn't have any tinge of courage in me...hell, I can't even tell him how much I miss him whenever he fails to SMS me...also, I don't want to tell him my feelings because I don't want to run over our friendship...Besides, he's happy now, I wouldn't possibly want to ruin it because...well...he's my friend...the only thing that sucks is that he seems so oblivious to this fact and he actually TELLS me everything (like, "hey, do you know? I really LOVE her..." blah blah blah...) ....damn, and yeah....my bestfriend is actually 20 years old, and his girlfriend is only 13 YEARS OLD...how's that for an age gap...*sigh*

[strydr]

But that doesnt mean you should give up, remember i also heard that she had a boyfriend, and to me it just made me think differently, maybe for the time being you should just stay his friend... for all you know he could break up with her next week then he at least has your shoulder to lean on, and then guess who is on his mind all day.
Also, do you have a diary, because that really helped me just write down all the damn ugly emotions i felt and how frustrated i was, i went to cut a damn tree down... its dead now, just lying there now, but just get out all your anger.
My advice is to write him letters but store it in a box and when he has broken up with the 13 YEAR OLD!! then you could show him how much you loved him from the beginning.
Tell me more about your problems...
sTrYdR

[Evenstar]

Actually, I thought of the same thing....but when I heard their story, I kinda lost hope...apparently they were a couple before, but right then, they weren't serious...but now...he told me that he realized that he really loves her even with their long time apart...it was like....man, they've known each other for so long and here I am, barging into their relationship and posing as a friend to the same guy I want to be with..

[strydr]

but it doesnt matter... like me, i didnt exactly deny my feelings i just decided that it wasnt my time to be with this person, and there is a time for everything and a place for everyone in the others heart... is it possible to kinda put your feelings inside a box filled with all your memories of this person and just kinda lock it away to be opened when the time is right???
because then you could be close to him and at the same time be a part of his life, because that is essential when it comes to the person, do you have enough memories to say that you have a normal relationship... memories is what you can talk about and say that 'we' have this and that, like something that only you two find really funny and special... u understand??
sTrYdR

[Evenstar]

Yeah...it's quite something...I don't know what to say...Thank you..

*sigh* How I wish I could see him whenever I want to...the problem is he's too far from me....distance....is another factor...

[strydr]

OOhhh!! dammit! that just sucks.
before i started liking my current girlfriend there was this girl. we met on a camp, started thinkin about her, but soon forgot about her, because she lives on the other side of the city, where my current girlfriend lives about 5 minutes away, i think thats why i chose her... because she was closer.
So you gonna take your feelings and hold them tight inside?? cause i think that it would affect not only you but the guy, and the girl will probably be pissed.

[Evenstar]

yeah....she'll be...if she'd already read my blog then she'll be PMsing his boyfriend to get the hell away from me...they're both in the other side of the city...almost like 3 hours away from our vicinity...*sigh*

[strydr]

Evenstar... (sigh)
what you definitely must understand is that there are so many people that are just like that guy, I bet you.
My girlfriend is starting to notice how many people are just like me, she even knows a guy with the same bday as me, talks the same and walks the same, likes the same things, thinks the way i do, does what i do, etc... and i keep telling her that there are so many people out there that are just like me, its just that her heart is set on me, and mine on hers and thats why she actually likes me, cause i bet if she found that Clone of me before she knew me she would have been going out with him instead... and i know its really sad (for me of course) but its so true. And again i say "Good things happen to those who wait" and "the unexpected will always hit you directly on the heart when you dont expect it." --- i had a similar incedent like i said before, just when i started liking her less, she came back and told me that she likes me... its like Newton's Law of Conservation... Total Love Before reaction = Total love after reaction ... therefore they will start liking you more...
all i am trying to say is that there is someone for you out there, that guy is busy so dont disturb, i dont think he would like that and at the same time he may hurt you more...
see ya, sTrYdR.

[WizKid77]

Sorry to hear bout that Shinigami_Josh. That really sucks and is messed up. So yeah, I'm back. Ok so the book apperently isn't closed on my situation yet. Kindof surprised but hey what-ever, not going to complain. So yeah the way it seems to be now, is that we're really close friends who are really affectionate to each other. Err... yeah. So yeah should I rewind to yesterday night I guess. Umm... yeah. So there was a huge group of us hanging out in her room. And slowly everyone started to leave (two people went outside for cigerettes, another to try and do work, another went to his room to call their girlfriend in Italy, another for food, another for no reason). But yeah so it was just me and her at that point. So we just went for a walk around. Then we studied at the library a bit. Then she asked me if I wanted to a watch a movie at her suite, of coarse I want's going to say no. So we started watching the movie, and started cuddling and then kissing. The movie kept freezing so we just ended up sleeping together on the couch (I mean by actually going to sleep, not the act for all you with your minds in the gutters). But yeah, for the record though couches aren't made for two people to sleep on. Anyway, everything seems cool now, I guess. What do you guys think?

[Ios]

that's about the same way I got with my previous girlfriend!
it's nice isn't it? =P

@ evenstar
is that 3 hour with train, by foot or with bike??
because, all the nice girls I know live in a village near mine so I'll have to bike there over an half an hour, but I really don't care about that, but on the other hand, 3 hours is bit much...

btw, if he's that far away, how come you guys are such good friend?

[strydr]

Sorry to hear bout that Shinigami_Josh. That really sucks and is messed up. So yeah, I'm back. Ok so the book apperently isn't closed on my situation yet. Kindof surprised but hey what-ever, not going to complain. So yeah the way it seems to be now, is that we're really close friends who are really affectionate to each other. Err... yeah. So yeah should I rewind to yesterday night I guess. Umm... yeah. So there was a huge group of us hanging out in her room. And slowly everyone started to leave (two people went outside for cigerettes, another to try and do work, another went to his room to call their girlfriend in Italy, another for food, another for no reason). But yeah so it was just me and her at that point. So we just went for a walk around. Then we studied at the library a bit. Then she asked me if I wanted to a watch a movie at her suite, of coarse I want's going to say no. So we started watching the movie, and started cuddling and then kissing. The movie kept freezing so we just ended up sleeping together on the couch (I mean by actually going to sleep, not the act for all you with your minds in the gutters). But yeah, for the record though couches aren't made for two people to sleep on. Anyway, everything seems cool now, I guess. What do you guys think?


Whoa! sounds something i want to do with my girlfriend, but the way i see it is she probably just wants to cuddle, but dude have faith, you may be the one who changes her thought, may be she will be YOUR Girlfriend... but i want to see what happens tomorrow, cause only time will tell... but i still think she is bad news... but thats me, like a lot of people think my girlfriend is bad news, but i know she has changed a lot so no one exactly knows her anymore. but its all good, remember only time will tell. Just go with the flow dude, thats my advice

[WizKid77]

you may be the one who changes her thought, may be she will be YOUR Girlfriend... but i want to see what happens tomorrow, cause only time will tell...
Ok I've got a minor update for you then. When we were hanging out at one point she mentioned she had a dream that dealt with the whole affectiante thing that I said (when we had that long talk) and she's been thinking about it. Pretty much what I said during the time she's referring to is something around the lines of "How can you be so affectiante like that without having feelings..." it was something similar to that. And about 5-10 minutes after that, she randomly said something around the lines of "this might ruin our friendship" which pretty much meant "I don't want to ruin our friendship". So yeah, that's all that's really worth updating you on I guess.

Put hey you know how things are. The world revolves in wierd ways sometimes. And only time will tell what'll happen...

[Lenne]

ok, this is kind of odd, but do you people consider it cheating when your bf/gf is checking out other guys/ hitting on other girls behind your back? and is there such a thing as cheating 'spiritually'? as in although you dont show it, you dont act it, but you secretly like another person, but the person with you is great and all that, but you still have feelings for another while at the same time liking the person you are with as well? sorry, sounds confusing @_@

[WizKid77]

ok, this is kind of odd, but do you people consider it cheating when your bf/gf is checking out other guys/ hitting on other girls behind your back? and is there such a thing as cheating 'spiritually'? as in although you dont show it, you dont act it, but you secretly like another person, but the person with you is great and all that, but you still have feelings for another while at the same time liking the person you are with as well? sorry, sounds confusing @_@
No I don't think it's considered cheating if you bf/gf is just checking out the person. Hitting on/flirting is a lil messed up but normal, just as long as they continue any further with that situation. Hmm.. cheating 'spiritually' is sort of possible but rare. Of coarse if there's any physical contact it's cheating. Even holding hands or cuddling cause yeah that's pretty much 'spiritually' cheating. Same goes if you hear them saying "I love you" to someone they shouldn't normally say that to. Have feelings for someone else is perfectly fine as long as you don't try act on those feelings or attempt anything like that. Hope that clears things up for you.

[Lenne]

hm... thanks^^ i guess that sort of makes sense, just had the discussion with a couple of friends, so was interested on more people's opinions. :)

[WizKid77]

hey anytime that's why we're here.

[strydr]

Ok I've got a minor update for you then. When we were hanging out at one point she mentioned she had a dream that dealt with the whole affectiante thing that I said (when we had that long talk) and she's been thinking about it. Pretty much what I said during the time she's referring to is something around the lines of "How can you be so affectiante like that without having feelings..." it was something similar to that. And about 5-10 minutes after that, she randomly said something around the lines of "this might ruin our friendship" which pretty much meant "I don't want to ruin our friendship". So yeah, that's all that's really worth updating you on I guess.
Put hey you know how things are. The world revolves in wierd ways sometimes. And only time will tell what'll happen...

ok Wizkid, my current girlfriend regected me thrice, but i didnt stop, but that was also the issue at one point, then ask her "What about friendship will be ruined?" - does she know that you guys will be best friends for the next (period of time you date) - and it will be an awesome adventure, and if your friendship was that strong then it would last regardless, so tell her to stop doing all the funny crap and just be your gf.
But dude i must say this sounds exactly like me and my current gf, she had her best friend ask her out, then she said no to him, then when i asked her she wasnt ready for it and she didnt want to hurt him more, which is pure crap... but i was in a situation of (boy likes girl, girl likes boy) but we werent going out, so i just asked her one day (do you really like me, or are you just playing with my heart, trying to get my money.)
Just tell her how you feel and what you want out of this relationship.
sTrYdR

[WizKid77]

She knows all of that already. Got denied twice already. I guess I'll just have to wait it out a bit. But we're still very affectionate with each other. And slept together the last two nights, unfortunately I'm sleepin alone tonight. Well time'll tell I guess.

[ILoveYouSoiFong]

All I want is Soi Fong.

[Lenne]

Relationships are so hard. i got a friend who got rejected again, and i swear we both have the same damned luck when it comes to guys. what do guys look for in a girl anyways? a good body, a nice personality, a pretty face?

[Icestorm]

depends on the guy.. for me.. looks arnt the most important thing.. i'd rather a kind personality than some girl that couldnt strike up a conversation if it hit her in the face.

[Lenne]

haha. was it really hard to find such a person? i mean if you have a girlfriend already, or if not, have you met anyone who you think you so to say 'fell in love with at first sight'?

[Icestorm]

i cant say that ive fell in love with anyone at first site.. or that what ive ever experienced is love, love is different for every person so its hard to define whether u actually felt it for that person or it was just infactuation, theres a fine line, but they are totally different.

[Lenne]

hm.. very true. reminds me of this weird romance book i read before. four stages to mature love, maybe it isnt as insane as i first thought it was. :) interesting.

[Icestorm]

haha yeah i believe thats the case but other people may not, but i sort of contridict myself when i say that when you feel love you know what it is, yet its hard to actually know your feeling it.. if you get what i mean?

[Lenne]

yup, exactly. very hard to understand what the feelings are. whether it is just attraction? liking one aspect of the person only, infatuation and being blind to their weaknesses. interesting topic. if only it wasnt so complicated lol.

[Icestorm]

ah yes, very many complications.. *sigh* so many different situations that change the relationships course completly. But in the end.. for me its not that im blind to any of the persons weaknesses i tend to overlook those things and look for the good things about the person rather than the bad.. looking at the bad is only going to get you thinking negatively when normally the good things about a person out weigh the bad..

[Lenne]

hm... overlooking but at the same time aware of their problems? i guess thats a pretty good way to handle things. hm.. out of curiousity, i just like to find out what the other gender thinks about lol. are you in a relationship right now?

[Icestorm]

to be honest yes.. BUT.. im having second thoughts.. im not sure this is the way i saw it happening and i dunno it somehow doesnt feel right.. but im giving it some time.. but at this point im confused.. about the whole situation in general

[Lenne]

hm... maybe you can tell me and we can figure this out together maybe? haha, if you want that is :)

[Icestorm]

there isnt that much to figure out really.. ive come to the conclusion that only time can tell what lies ahead for us.. if anything.. time in relationships i find is like a fix all solution, in most cases you have to give the problem time and thought to decide on the best action.

[Lenne]

lol, dont really want to talk about it huh? i see. although your vagueness makes me extremely curious to find out what is going on. i'm a push over for relationship stories :P if you want you can pm me the story^^ or not, thats fine too.

[Icestorm]

oh no.. theres no story.. ive told you all there is.. at this point.. it just isnt 'feeling' right.. i thought it would be different.. its very hard to explain what i mean.. perhaps its just the old 'we're not right for eachother'

[Lenne]

aw... was looking forward to exciting stuff. haha, joking>< although, why doesnt it feel right? was it something she did? or what? i mean, it should be easier to talk about it right? i'm sorry if i seem like i'm prying. ><

[Icestorm]

oh no its fine im pretty open with these kind of things.. its just hard to explain.. its in a way awkward.. like alot of what we felt changed when we started going out.. i dont know how that works but it changed.

[Lenne]

ooh, how did it change? after the first date? third date? you two dont talk as much? lol. if you dont mind me asking, did you ask her out or did she go after you?

[Icestorm]

its hard to explain how it changed it was just like a feeling in the air.. like an atmosphere.. that made it.. very forced to strike up conversations and stuff.. i asked her out but i already knew she liked me before.. and she knew i like her.. ( stupid friend) so it wasnt really a one way or another type.

[Lenne]

hm.... sounds like a good scenario though^^ i would kill to have the guy i like like me. how did you two first meet? are you two the same age? hahaa, same school? or long distance? (i feel weird grilliing you about all this, i promise after it will be my turn to spill beans^^)

[Icestorm]

ahaha no i wont oblige you to spill any of your 'beans' lol , we first met through the same friend, shes one year younger, she goes to an all girls private school where as i go to a co-ed, government school (weird ay..) and we are pretty close.. 10mins about.. would you like to know a dark secret of mine?

[Lenne]

oooh, yes yes. do tell^^ (LOL)

[Icestorm]

ill pm it to you.. kinda personal :)

[Lenne]

ok! relationships are so interesting. all different shapes and sizes and kinds. my head spins (so i'm not spamming and is staying on topic)

[Icestorm]

lol yes *cough* relationships.. umm yes about that *cough* i gotta go *cough* i sent pm *cough* yes and about that 'relationship' problem your having *wink* ill speak to you later.. :P

[Lenne]

yup, definitely. i wonder, how will i get this guy i like to face me with the truth? i wonder....

[strydr]

hey my bleachers!
A few weeks back i asked you about holding my girlfriends hand and how do i do it... well my new rule is let everything just happen by itself, everything...
because this weekend we were at our city's festival and then there was a point in time when i lost her in the crowd of mass called PEOPLE, then when i found her WE held EACH OTHER'S hands... OMG guys it was the best, cause it brings you closer literally and figuratively... but ya, we first were just holdin hand in hand, then it moved into fingers in fingers then to arm locked into arm so that my arm was against her and her arm against me... i really found it amazing! my advice for all the new couples, before you kiss hold hands tightly... LOL!
but thanx a lot once again for your guys advice last week about my problems, i will be sure to have a problem by the end of this week... ;).
c ya.
sTrYdR

[Ios]

but thanx a lot once again for your guys advice last week about my problems, i will be sure to have a problem by the end of this week... ;).
c ya.
sTrYdR

don't hope so for you :D ;)

well, the thing is, you can't plan anything in love...
I always make things up when, I'm in bed (no not the preverted stuff), about how I'm gonna talk to the girl I like but it NEVER works out that way.
pretty funny actually...

[strydr]

In my country we have a long weekend coming up, from the 17th Friday till the 21st of March.
Some bad news i found out last week, is that the Girlfriend is leaving on the 4th of April for pilgrimage, now my question is should i try to make this weekend special by giving our first kiss, since she is leaving for a month and i would want her to remember me, OR should i rather wait for the RIGHT moment, which may come only way after she comes back, also our 4 month anniversary is coming up, (the 28th of March), so should i celebrate this long weekend with a kiss, and say it is for our 4 month anniversary.
cause i wouldnt want her to leave for that month and come back feeling crap, u guys and gals understand??

[Ios]

Hey, you're having a problem already?!

mmmm, I think you should do it in the weekend.
I mean if it's that special to you, then she'd know you love her would make her eager to come back. (eehm, I don't know if those were the words I was searching for...)
And also, you can keep pushing that moment forward but I think you have to make that moment yourself. waiting isn't going to work.
My view of your GF is (probably wrong) this:
a very nice girl, but one who has a hard time making a move (is shy). but, on the other hand, might still want to take another step. so that has to come from YOU. She could also get a little desperate, because you are dating for a whie now and still haven't kissed. (that's another reason to kiss her)

[strydr]

wow! ok kewl, then it's settled, i am gonna aim for this weekend!
Whoa! i am getting excited... ok, but i gotta plan it well as well, like a nice scenery and a nice atmosphere...
gonna checl the weather for the whole weekend now...
thanx a lot Telemaster, and i think you were right about the gf.
sTrYdR.

[Ios]

oh, what a surprise, I was right :D <-wasn't sarcastic...

well, like I said before you can't really plan anything. Of course you can set up a scenery and stuff, but then what?? I mean, were you planning on sitting in your room for the whole time and talk or something?
Oh I just got an idea. go watch a movie or something. Not to the movies but just rent one and well just watch it and see what happens ;)

[strydr]

mmm... still thinkin, but i got a plan to get a moment alone on the bridge.
another thing is that should you have Breath freshners?? since i got an absyss in my salivary glands that makes my breath stink NATURALLY, so what should i do.

[Ios]

easy, get breath freshners.
not really for your breath but more for your peace of mind.
when you kiss, you don't breathe in eachothers mouth. (you doing something wrong if you do so.) When I kissed my previous girlfriend I never noticed some smell or something.

[strydr]

kewl! ok, then (tick) breath freshners...
hope it all goes well.
thanx a lot, i am gonna sleep now.
sTrYdR - btw, its 23h30 here.

[Ios]

you're an hour forward on me but I'm going as well.
good luck on your gf man!
don't forget them!

[Lenne]

okey, i need an opinon here. i just recently met talked to this guy on msn. we havent exactly met before, i gave him a note with my phone and email at this restaurant >< but anyways, i thought he was pretty cute, we talked on Sat for about 4 hours on msn. so heres the thing, should i wait for him to ask me out? or should i suggest we hang out?

[strydr]

hanging out is always kewl, cause you get to know who the person really is and then you can actually like him or hate him based on how he is and not on his appearance... if you gonna wait for him to make the first move then you might be waiting the whole month... so take the initiative.

[strydr]

i dont want to enter anything into this box... but instead i will rather send that message as a pm to a fellow bleacher... sorry, but i would never try to be noob, just forgive me, since i wrote something which could mess up a certain situation

[Ios]

oh, dude... you told her about the kiss?!
that's pretty dumb to be honest, it messes up completely the whole romantic idea, dude...
yeah, It would have been better if you asked her a little earlier, but that doesn't mean she has to react so uninterested... I'm sorry but I also don't really know what to advize you. I guess you should do it earlier then or something... At least try to hang around with her as much as possible this week, but I guess you thought of that as well...

[strydr]

thanx Telemaster, i will keep you posted about my issue, since i am feeling a bit better just talking to you guys about my problems...
c ya soon
sTrYdR

[Nichigo]

okey, i need an opinon here. i just recently met talked to this guy on msn. we havent exactly met before, i gave him a note with my phone and email at this restaurant >< but anyways, i thought he was pretty cute, we talked on Sat for about 4 hours on msn. so heres the thing, should i wait for him to ask me out? or should i suggest we hang out?

You should get to know the guy better...and like...in person. Any relationship that's carried over the internet is... well... weak imo. you can't notice the subtleties of the other person because you dont' really even see them that much. You say you've seen this person like in person? If you have access to this person in the 'real world', you need to hang out with him for a bit before you make a decision on whether you even wanna date the guy.

[Lenne]

You should get to know the guy better...and like...in person. Any relationship that's carried over the internet is... well... weak imo. you can't notice the subtleties of the other person because you dont' really even see them that much. You say you've seen this person like in person? If you have access to this person in the 'real world', you need to hang out with him for a bit before you make a decision on whether you even wanna date the guy.

thanks for the words! i'm going to hang out with him tomorrow^^ wish me luck

[strydr]

good luck
hey wanted to ask, is it ok to call your girlfriend once or twice a day... cause i phone her everyday to find out how she is doing, but the whole thing is that when it comes to the weekend when we meet we talk about other things, not about the news, so is it good to talk over the phone so much?? especially in a long relationship - well it has been 4 months

[Nichigo]

good luck
hey wanted to ask, is it ok to call your girlfriend once or twice a day... cause i phone her everyday to find out how she is doing, but the whole thing is that when it comes to the weekend when we meet we talk about other things, not about the news, so is it good to talk over the phone so much?? especially in a long relationship - well it has been 4 months

Sure is man...that's how you get to know each other better. I talk to my GF everday...phone, instant message, or in person depending on where we're at. We've been together for 7 months now, and i still love talking to her :doindadom

[strydr]

i know what you mean when you say you love talking to her, because with my girlfriend i can talk to her about everything really... and it is really nice to know that she is listening...
Wow! 7 months! nice dude.
but what i mean is once you have gotten to know each other very well, is it ok to feel like you are bothering her with a call that she maybe doesnt want???

[Nichigo]

Ask her if it bothers her. If it does, then try to make your calls less frequent. But if it doesn't, then do as you please ^_^. Stuff like this really depends on the couples. I know a husband and wife that's been married for 20+ years, and the husband calls his wife every day at work *^_^*. Other people just don't like to talk on the phone. So it depends on you guys. Just ask her to be honest and tell you if it bothers her.

[strydr]

ok... kewl, then i would have to talk to her over the phone...lol.
i spend about an hour a day on the phone with the gf and her mother and father actually get really pissed off at me, but i cant help myself, because i was born to speak on the phone... i cant control myself.
but i really like talking to her...

[Nichigo]

hehe...that's another thing though...you NEED to get along with the parents. When you hook up with the chick, you're hooking up with her parents too. If it's possible, i'd recommend visiting her house more often and actually talking to the parents - just get to know them. I go to my GF's house all the time and talk with her mom...play with her siblings and all. Her family is my family ^_^

[strydr]

i like that thinkin... i love playing around and making jokes with her sister, and telling her that she hates me for dating her sister... then she sucks up and says she doesnt... it is so funny.
Thanx a lot, that helped a lot... i think i gotta connect to you in MSN...

[Nichigo]

hehe...you live and you learn bro. I'm old...this is like my 3rd relationship this long...i've learned alot through those experiences. ^_^

oh...and I have an MSN name, but i never log onto it hehe.

[strydr]

hey bleachers!
u know when you call your girlfriend/ boyfriend... and they say, "I have something to talk about." and now they make you think and think... is it bad or good, positive or negative... is this the break up or is it the start of the best thing that ever happened... AARRGGH!!
damn, i just got one of those, i hope for the best, and i ask for the answer in my dreams... hopefully, she still feels the same way she did last week (check previous posts)... OMG!
I am gonna sleep now... bi bi bleacherS!

[moat]

well, speaking of relationships. i've recently managed to kill all the emoness inside me, and now totally free of its emotional bullshit, and now hunt, thats right hunt down prey, b'cuz i wanna try and have sex with as many women as possible. relationships are gay! filled with nothing but restrictions and headaches. its much funner to just get what i want, and not have to worry about anything after that. ^_^

p.s. - you can reply to this post with your opinions, but.......i don't really care bout your opinions, so don't waste your time and energy.

[dragoneyes001]

well, speaking of relationships. i've recently managed to kill all the emoness inside me, and now totally free of its emotional bullshit, and now hunt, thats right hunt down prey, b'cuz i wanna try and have sex with as many women as possible. relationships are gay! filled with nothing but restrictions and headaches. its much funner to just get what i want, and not have to worry about anything after that. ^_^
p.s. - you can reply to this post with your opinions, but.......i don't really care bout your opinions, so don't waste your time and energy.

if your just looking for sex! and no emotional attachment why bother hunting at all its a waste of effort just go to your local red light district and get yourself a hooker! its totally unemotional sex no ties not wasted time!
also if its strictly numbers of women you want I'm sure theres plenty of different hookers available so you can rack up the numbers!

just dont expect them to care a wit about you it'll be just your money and a job to them!

besides if you do hunt and manage to get sex from one night stands they still want to talk to you maybe have breakfast or even hang around for the day ( damn thats just too relationship like isnt it?)
and what if they like you after and want to call back?
no its much better that you become a john for your local prostitutes they wont bother you with any of that little crap that goes with getting in bed with other women does!

[moat]

hahaha! thats easy! you want them to stick around! when you have em' wrapped around you finger, and you can control them, all that stuff is easily taken care of. when they're like puppy in your hands, anything is possible. thats the ultimate goal. so that if its good, you can go back whenever and not have to deal with too much bs. the whole trick is keeping them. you want as many as you can. its like....pokemon. cuz if one dies/"faints" you just grab another one. ^_^

XD

[dragoneyes001]

hahaha! thats easy! you want them to stick around! when you have em' wrapped around you finger, and you can control them, all that stuff is easily taken care of. when they're like puppy in your hands, anything is possible. thats the ultimate goal. so that if its good, you can go back whenever and not have to deal with too much bs. the whole trick is keeping them. you want as many as you can. its like....pokemon. cuz if one dies/"faints" you just grab another one. ^_^
XD

hope your medical is payed up you'll need it sooner or later!

besides if you think being a player will be easier with less BS you obviously dont know what your talking about!

I've known too many really good players and I'll never put up with all the crap they have to, to be that way! and when you finaly do like someone enough to comit your choice will come back and haunt you thats a guarantee you can take to the bank!

I'm not sure of your age and it really doesnt matter since I'll mention my experience over the years I've gone several years as a bachelor from one girl to another and several long term relationships but like I said I wouldnt do what your describing simply because its so packed with BS to deal with! just because I stayed single for a number of years and was with women for short periods each did not make me a player I didnt decieve them or treat them as pieces of meat we both agreed to non comital relations or we happened to like each other enough to go have a romp together each encounter was different in its own way, yet theres a huge difference between being available and purposely leading them on!

when you finaly twist yourself into a few corners with women who can effectively turn off the woman tap(you know the ones who happen to know everyone) on you your going to learn what I mean by too much BS with being a player!

[Nichigo]

hey bleachers!
u know when you call your girlfriend/ boyfriend... and they say, "I have something to talk about." and now they make you think and think... is it bad or good, positive or negative... is this the break up or is it the start of the best thing that ever happened... AARRGGH!!
damn, i just got one of those, i hope for the best, and i ask for the answer in my dreams... hopefully, she still feels the same way she did last week (check previous posts)... OMG!
I am gonna sleep now... bi bi bleacherS!

Good luck man...let us know how it goes :redbiggri

[yumisan]

ok..people*the people expert in relationship* i need some help here and it is driving me crazy..you see i have a friend here name M.he likes this girl very very much *J* and they are very good friends together since last year.M will tell everything about his problem to her and she helps him.they are very close.mind that.M always sit next to her in the bus and talk. *i'm going to cut short it a little bit*
and one day...something happens.this is the main part.M said something to her and made her very very mad but the problem was solve.the think is...she still tried to avoid him and this M is still chasing after her asking for forgiveness and why is she avoiding him but she won't although he keep on trying to chase and running towards her.friends around are trying to console her to forgive him but she does not like it and said that all her friends are on his side and not on her side.so since that day..M do not mix much with his friends that he use to mix with to make her happy that their friends are on her side.since that day...M has less and less friends and he is depress and angry now.M said that she is the only person she can really trust because his other friends are not reliable enough.they back stab him when his not around and thats why *J* is like his life and he fills like killing himself.he do not know what to do to have *J*forgive him and trust him back.
hope someone could give advice...lol...i ain't going to read the whole tread to find a solution for him.:D
so good advice please..

[strydr]

ok..people*the people expert in relationship* i need some help here and it is driving me crazy..you see i have a friend here name M.he likes this girl very very much *J* and they are very good friends together since last year.M will tell everything about his problem to her and she helps him.they are very close.mind that.M always sit next to her in the bus and talk. *i'm going to cut short it a little bit*
and one day...something happens.this is the main part.M said something to her and made her very very mad but the problem was solve.the think is...she still tried to avoid him and this M is still chasing after her asking for forgiveness and why is she avoiding him but she won't although he keep on trying to chase and running towards her.friends around are trying to console her to forgive him but she does not like it and said that all her friends are on his side and not on her side.so since that day..M do not mix much with his friends that he use to mix with to make her happy that their friends are on her side.since that day...M has less and less friends and he is depress and angry now.M said that she is the only person she can really trust because his other friends are not reliable enough.they back stab him when his not around and thats why *J* is like his life and he fills like killing himself.he do not know what to do to have *J*forgive him and trust him back.
hope someone could give advice...lol...i ain't going to read the whole tread to find a solution for him.:D
so good advice please..

Well, i went through something like that sometime last year... i liked this girl who didnt like me, and i went through depression too, and i am sorry to say that i wanted to commit suicide too, but it was good for me. Since i didnt care about my life i didnt fear death, i can die now and it wouldnt matter (i know it is hard, but it is the truth), so now i am a 'fearless' person, and this person who didnt like me, likes me now.
My thinking is that your friend should just wait, because if the girl does actually like him, she will come running back to him with open arms... i think what a girl wants to see is that the guy is cool with the fact that she isnt with him anymore, rather calm down and rest and take a breather, than become a stalker and go insane just trying to find this girl... CHILL RELAX!
if he (you) want to express his feelings then write a letter, cause it usually gets the truth out there.

but if the advice i gave you isnt enough just ask what you are trying find out specifically... ask a question at a time

[strydr]

hey, just to tell everyone, my girlfriend didnt mean anything bad when she called (Shoo!), she wanted to talk about something small... but she made it sound bad.
So it is more than cool now. Just wanted to tell.
but planning to kiss her soon... i am really excited.

[Lenne]

lol, anyhows, another one of my dumb questions. but is it a big step for guys to tell a girl they've only known for 2 weeks about their ex girlfriend, how they broke up wat he thought of her etc? >_>

[dragoneyes001]

ok..people*the people expert in relationship* i need some help here and it is driving me crazy..you see i have a friend here name M.he likes this girl very very much *J* and they are very good friends together since last year.M will tell everything about his problem to her and she helps him.they are very close.mind that.M always sit next to her in the bus and talk. *i'm going to cut short it a little bit*
and one day...something happens.this is the main part.M said something to her and made her very very mad but the problem was solve.the think is...she still tried to avoid him and this M is still chasing after her asking for forgiveness and why is she avoiding him but she won't although he keep on trying to chase and running towards her.friends around are trying to console her to forgive him but she does not like it and said that all her friends are on his side and not on her side.so since that day..M do not mix much with his friends that he use to mix with to make her happy that their friends are on her side.since that day...M has less and less friends and he is depress and angry now.M said that she is the only person she can really trust because his other friends are not reliable enough.they back stab him when his not around and thats why *J* is like his life and he fills like killing himself.he do not know what to do to have *J*forgive him and trust him back.
hope someone could give advice...lol...i ain't going to read the whole tread to find a solution for him.:D
so good advice please..

without any idea what he told her to get her so mad at him means we cant give advice that would be worth anything since what was said could change any advice we give !

[WizKid77]

lol, anyhows, another one of my dumb questions. but is it a big step for guys to tell a girl they've only known for 2 weeks about their ex girlfriend, how they broke up wat he thought of her etc? >_>
Well you at the point that you still just know her for 2 weeks or have you been with her for 2 weeks? If you've only known her for 2 weeks then yeah it's probably a little too soon to talk about stuff like that unless she knew your ex-gfs and your situations with them. Or at least knew you were going out w/ that person. If you've been with her for 2 weeks then, well it's not that big a step and is appropriate.

[yumisan]

well,the fact is i don't even know what he said to her in 3 words..><
he won't tell me about that but is not the words we had in mind nor it is opposite.he's trying to release his anger and depression by playing archery since that is the only way to control him down.><

[Hinatetsu]

Ok, get this. One of my ex boyfriends, who I talked about a long long time ago, and is also one of my current friends has been telling his father and friends that he 1.) wants to go back out with me, 2.) wouldn't mind making even more of a commitment and marrying me (o.O) and 3.) even hints around about such things when we talks to me (ex. "you could never annoy me" and "I don't understand why you don't want a boyfriend yet" and even "why don't you come with me on vacation" ect). I choose to ignore all this because a relationship between us could never work.
However, when we go out as friends, like yesterday when we made plans to go see a movie, he acts completely different. When we were talking about seeing a movie, he didn't want to come to where I was because the movie theater wasn't worth it. (that's right, you charmer, make ME drive) But then, and I have no idea how, the movie went from being at a theater to just watching anime in his apartment. (o.O) I was fine with that, even though it still is strange that he doesn't think I'm worth it to come over to my house, even though he wants to date me and all that.
Can you guys please explain to me what you think he iis trying to do? Because it isn't very impressive at all and is getting rather annoying.

[Ios]

@ yumisan
why don't you go to that girl and say something like:
Please forgive him, ATM he's being pretty depressed and stuff cause you were the onlyone he felt like he could trust.
something like that...
I don't know if it was a help but this is a pretty messed up situation

@ hinatetsu
eh, yeah, that's pretty weird.
If I'm in love with a girl I'd really do VERY much for her.
I guess he just doesn't know what he wants. I think he's not really in love but this is the first time for him getting so far near love, and therefore he said some things on what he didn't realize what it actually includes

[Hinatetsu]

Thank you. :) That's what I'm thinking too. It would actually work out better that way anyway, since I don't have to break it to him for the third time that I'm not into him that way....

[Ios]

Thank you. :) That's what I'm thinking too. It would actually work out better THAT way anyway, since I don't have to BREAK IT TO HIM for the third time that I'm not into him that way....

explain yourself...
what do you mean by that?

[yumisan]

but the problem is...she does not like her friends telling her to forgive him becuase he depressed now...you see there is a situation where ones she kinda blame him for taking all her friends away from her to be on his side and she not happy about it.that's why M does not mix with his friends anymore to let all his friends be on her side and people thinks now that M is very arrogant><

[Nichigo]

but the problem is...she does not like her friends telling her to forgive him becuase he depressed now...you see there is a situation where ones she kinda blame him for taking all her friends away from her to be on his side and she not happy about it.that's why M does not mix with his friends anymore to let all his friends be on her side and people thinks now that M is very arrogant><

You don't have to answer this if you don't want to, but are you sure you're not talking about yourself in third person? The whole third person narration is throwing me off lol. If it's you, it'll be easier to tell if you just say so...but if it's not you...ignore me XD

[yumisan]

You don't have to answer this if you don't want to, but are you sure you're not talking about yourself in third person? The whole third person narration is throwing me off lol. If it's you, it'll be easier to tell if you just say so...but if it's not you...ignore me XD

okay then....>
>i ignore you since it is not me..XD
>I 'm just trying to help out my this crazy friend...lol..i never seen him like this before since small....very sad to see him suffering and thats why i trying to help him><

[Icestorm]

@Hinatetsu: ok im guessing that either he is confused about what he actually wants even though he said all those things.. or he thinks that hes in love but really its just an attraction.. theres a fine line between love and infatuation.. it could be either but i dont think that he really is in love with you.. simple tasks like going to the cinema are nothing if love has its way with someone.. people will drive across 3 states.. to get to love.

[Ios]

but the problem is...she does not like her friends telling her to forgive him becuase he depressed now...you see there is a situation where ones she kinda blame him for taking all her friends away from her to be on his side and she not happy about it.that's why M does not mix with his friends anymore to let all his friends be on her side and people thinks now that M is very arrogant><

I think the girl is too afraid to get hurt but the thing is... she has GOT to go through a painful situation if she wants her friends back and everything.
Running away isn't going to hep her.
If I were you I'd go to her and just make her listen to me and explain her she'd mess up if she'd keep running away. It's like either admit your wrong and excuse to your friends OR find new one's.

I had some sort of situation like that a while ago as well.
Me and my friend were on the same room at skivakation and at the half of the week we were really annoying to eachother and one night when we lay in bed, we talked and said what we don't like about eachother. It was one of the most painful moments of my life but after that we even got a little more close. So the outcome of painful moments aren't always bad.

[MVIK]

there's something i wanna ask from u ppl. Do u think long distance relationship will last? Long, as in I'm in UK n she's in M'sia, halfway around the world.
Had already confessed to her once last yr but failed and so
I decided to confess to her again last month, but afta that i think that this wouldnt even last a week, so i plan on leaving it till later June during her performance.
Any opinions?

[strydr]

there's something i wanna ask from u ppl. Do u think long distance relationship will last? Long, as in I'm in UK n she's in M'sia, halfway around the world.
Had already confessed to her once last yr but failed and so
I decided to confess to her again last month, but afta that i think that this wouldnt even last a week, so i plan on leaving it till later June during her performance.
Any opinions?

Well, i think that if love was meant to be between you, and that both of you have an understanding, then it will work. I mean even a relationship that works on a basis like (only weekends, during the week dont meet, and just call once or twice) - there is nothing stopping each partner to have a Week-Partner and a Weekend-Partner; except your feelings and what you have agreed upon, i mean for me - i really love my girlfriend and would never think of cheating on her even if a super model appeared right in front of me... what i mean is that if you are truly in love, and the partner as well... then there should never be a problem with cheating and loyalty...
If thats the way you feel dude, then go for it... else just have fun when you go back to malaysia...
tell me what you think, or if you have another problem..
sTrYdR

[MVIK]

well, last yr confession is a failure becuz i didnt really said it clear. But then i jus cant be bother to make it clear wat i meant, n jus tried to find another time to confess... nieway, thx for your help

[Lenne]

well, this sucks >.> i've learned never to trust your friends with information or ask them to help you in any way. theres this guy i really like, i've only met for about 2 weeks, off to a pretty good start i guess. but then he just broke up with his ex, and he said he really isnt in the mood to be dating anyone just yet. i told a friend on the phone that all i wanted to know from him is whether or not he likes me, and then she just goes and asked him on msn in such a straight forward way, now the dude probably thinks i'm a cowardly desperate whore for not saying it to him myself but instead got a friend to ask for me >.>

[strydr]

damn, thats nasty, that friend is an IDIOT! my friend did that too once upon a time, but the one thing you can do to redeem yourself is to just go ask him yourself... then he would probably just say something like, "ya, i know, your friend told me" :o then you could be so shocked, and be so surprised...
but i think you will regain his idea of you being courageous, if you just ask him yourself the next time you guys see one another.

[yumisan]

I think the girl is too afraid to get hurt but the thing is... she has GOT to go through a painful situation if she wants her friends back and everything.
Running away isn't going to hep her.
If I were you I'd go to her and just make her listen to me and explain her she'd mess up if she'd keep running away. It's like either admit your wrong and excuse to your friends OR find new one's.
I had some sort of situation like that a while ago as well.
Me and my friend were on the same room at skivakation and at the half of the week we were really annoying to eachother and one night when we lay in bed, we talked and said what we don't like about eachother. It was one of the most painful moments of my life but after that we even got a little more close. So the outcome of painful moments aren't always bad.

that's true and i told him and he keep on saying it is useless...mu close friend knew about it...but we just don't have any idea to help him....i mean to us is also partly the girl fault that make my friend go nuts...and he is really crazy about her..-_-""
well...my friend have said sorry and explain everything that in the conclusion he admit he was in the wrong.lol...it's like giving a speech like i could say:D
But the girl thinks he is mentally ill or something....haizz....i guess girl does not want him anymore but at least she still can be friend with him...
anyway thanks for the help....i think he could find a new good friend to talk with soon but he still won't get over this problem yet...thanks for the help..

[Lenne]

damn, thats nasty, that friend is an IDIOT! my friend did that too once upon a time, but the one thing you can do to redeem yourself is to just go ask him yourself... then he would probably just say something like, "ya, i know, your friend told me" :o then you could be so shocked, and be so surprised...
but i think you will regain his idea of you being courageous, if you just ask him yourself the next time you guys see one another.

lol, thanx, i dunno, i feel as if doing that might just make things worse >.> i suppose i could do that, if i gain the courage by tomorrow (i might see him tomorrow lol<.<). but yeah, a complicated situation, and isnt reli in the mood to date anyone, and maybe hes just in the process of getting to know me or, i dunno >.< but yeah, thanks for the advice!

[Avenged Sevenfold]

Yeah i could use some help...

Well a few years back i used to be a major man whore and people new it. I used to think it was good attracting all these girls but then i realised the type of girl i was attracting. Aparently they thought i was easy and had no intentions of a relationship, which neither did i at that point. As i matured i realised what i was doing, and decided i wanted a relationship with someone who i could love and would love me back, but meeting someone like that with my reputation was hard.

So i went cold turkey for about a year and a half, and eventualy the rumours subsided. I met many girls who were interested in me, but i was searching for the ONE.

That special person, you cant stop thinking about, the last thing you think of before you go to sleep, first thing you think of when you wake up. The person who walks in room full of people and you can only see them. The person that makes the only thing you look forward to is the next time you see them. The person who is not only beautiful in appearance, but is also a beautiful kisser and has a beautiful personality. The person that you can introduce to your friends, and know they wont say a bad thing about her cause there aint anything bad so say. When all you do is smile when thinking bout them, find yourself listenin to the songs that remind you of them over an over an over again... Love.

Well i thought i found that person, and i told her about my feelings for her and how i wanted a relationship. She said she wanted the same, a long term serious relationship, so we started dating and for the first time in along time i was happy and life couldnt have been better... Until she started ignoring my calls, and my messages and when i confronted her found out that she no longer wanted a relationship, but still wanted to do "stuff" with me.

That broke my heart, all that told me was that she wanted to do "stuff" with other guys aswell as me. I denied her offer, as it was against my new beliefs. I couldnt bare sharing her with anyone else.

However (yes it gets worse) the ONE was also best friends with my best friends, so everytime i go out at weekends or anytime at all basicaly i am reminded of the one woman i love... The one woman i can't have.

I tried talking to her about how awkward it was for me seeing her, and how much it was hurting me, all she said was "I understand." then nothing else. I have thought about not seeing my friends anymore but i dont think i could live without them... So for the past few months i have endured and endured but im not sure how much more i cant take... Its effecting my work and my social life... I realy don't know what to do.

Iv tried moving on, but i dont even look at super models the same way i look at her... Its torture... She on the other hand had found it easy to move on... and its eating me up inside.

So i ask... people i havnt even met before... help me... :sad:

[BigSteve03]

Honestly, it sounds like your real problem isn't with, her but with your friends. Not to sound harsh, but I think everyone has to go through what you're going through with this girl at least once. Everyone ends up getting their heart really and truely broke at some point, and it takes you quite a long time to get over it, but in the end it makes you a better person and makes you appreciate real love when you finally found it.

If this girl basically left you for a friend of a friend, who continues to hang out with you all the time, you need to work it out with him. I'm not sure how it is where you're at, but every guy I've ever thought of as a friend has always had the same rule about never going after a guy's ex when they were as close as you two sound, let alone going after her while you're still together. You're friend needs to back off and dump her, since it sounds like its not that serious with them, if he's a real friend to you. Its the only real way to stay friends at t his point. If he wont, and he might not since you said he's a friend of a friend, you need to work things out with the rest of your group. Tell them you just can't hang out with this person any more, and they need to find a way to split time between the two of you.

Either way, it really sounds like you need to put as much distance between yourself and this girl as possible. Get away from her, and let her get out of your system, and you'll be just fine.

[Avenged Sevenfold]

Thanks that realy helps... Thats what i was thinking i said to my friends that i needed to get her out my system but didnt want to make them decide between who they like better my ex or i.

It is not that she is with one of my friends or even a friend of a friend, but that we share the same group of friends :(

I thought about disapearing for a while to get her out of my system but not seeing her was also painful.

I think whatever i do, either way its going to be painful, i thought i could just be her friend but im not so sure anymore...

A7X

[BigSteve03]

You shouldnt have to disapear. You still need to go out and hang with your friends. Sitting home alone feeling sorry for yourself will be just as bad as being around her all the time. If you just share the same group of friends, then they definitely should be able to accomodate you and hang out with each of you seperately.

As for being friends with her, based on what you said about how much you cared for her, and how bad the break up was, there's no way I can imagine staying friends with her. I dont even see how people can stay friends with ex's when the relationship ended on good terms, let alone when it ended the way yours did.

[Avenged Sevenfold]

haha thats what i always thought too... Its just to awkward right? :D

I guess im just clinging to the hope that she'l come to her senses... But i don't know.

[BigSteve03]

Its not a matter of her coming to her senses or not. It just sounds like she needs to grow up a little more. She's not mature enough to handle a real relationship at this point in her life. Nothing will change that but time, and you dont need to be sitting around waiting on her to grow up while she's catting around with other guys.

[strydr]

Yeah i could use some help...
Well a few years back i used to be a major man whore and people new it. I used to think it was good attracting all these girls but then i realised the type of girl i was attracting. Aparently they thought i was easy and had no intentions of a relationship, which neither did i at that point. As i matured i realised what i was doing, and decided i wanted a relationship with someone who i could love and would love me back, but meeting someone like that with my reputation was hard.
So i went cold turkey for about a year and a half, and eventualy the rumours subsided. I met many girls who were interested in me, but i was searching for the ONE.
That special person, you cant stop thinking about, the last thing you think of before you go to sleep, first thing you think of when you wake up. The person who walks in room full of people and you can only see them. The person that makes the only thing you look forward to is the next time you see them. The person who is not only beautiful in appearance, but is also a beautiful kisser and has a beautiful personality. The person that you can introduce to your friends, and know they wont say a bad thing about her cause there aint anything bad so say. When all you do is smile when thinking bout them, find yourself listenin to the songs that remind you of them over an over an over again... Love.
Well i thought i found that person, and i told her about my feelings for her and how i wanted a relationship. She said she wanted the same, a long term serious relationship, so we started dating and for the first time in along time i was happy and life couldnt have been better... Until she started ignoring my calls, and my messages and when i confronted her found out that she no longer wanted a relationship, but still wanted to do "stuff" with me.
That broke my heart, all that told me was that she wanted to do "stuff" with other guys aswell as me. I denied her offer, as it was against my new beliefs. I couldnt bare sharing her with anyone else.
However (yes it gets worse) the ONE was also best friends with my best friends, so everytime i go out at weekends or anytime at all basicaly i am reminded of the one woman i love... The one woman i can't have.
I tried talking to her about how awkward it was for me seeing her, and how much it was hurting me, all she said was "I understand." then nothing else. I have thought about not seeing my friends anymore but i dont think i could live without them... So for the past few months i have endured and endured but im not sure how much more i cant take... Its effecting my work and my social life... I realy don't know what to do.
Iv tried moving on, but i dont even look at super models the same way i look at her... Its torture... She on the other hand had found it easy to move on... and its eating me up inside.
So i ask... people i havnt even met before... help me... :sad:


WOW! that sounds almost exactly like my story. dude what you have to do is kinda show her that you are over her, because it is actually that small realisation that scares you or anyone, like you said how easy it was for her to get over it and that really pissed you off (play fire with fire, but real fire) you gotta show the same amount of courage. In my case the girl i really liked TOLD me that she liked me, but didnt want to go out with me... I still find that weird even now that we are going out, but the fact that she told that she liked me and still rejected me was Bull*! and since she was also my sisters' friend, she was always around me. But when i asked her if she wanted a boyfriend and she said NO! i was so upset, i basically had to let go of all my feelings, but where our stories differ is that on that weekend i cut off all my hair and started off new ( by the way, that triggered her to think how special i was in her life... maybe by her not seeing you, she will see some truth... ), i went out to places i knew she wouldnt go with my cousin instead of my friends, cause i would surely bump into her with my friends, but my cousins fit a different group... but what is important is that you get away from her, and DO things so that you dont end up thinking about this person, cause i KNOW it hurts like hell, i have been there... and i hate it. but what i also understood, is that the girl was not what i wanted, same like you, she DOESNT want what you want, end of story... how can you like someone that basically doesnt want to be with you, rather just wants to mess with your feelings.
Another thing, be cheerful, cause if you are sad or down, she would have accomplished her goal of trying to pull you down with her, since she must be a sad person to be using guys for pleasure. dude, i dont know about you, but i believe in fate, and with that i say, everything happens for a reason, everything! this is just a process for you to grow so when you find the ONE you will be ready to face the challenges of what is to come... just watch.
Your story has a hell of a lot of similarities compared to mine, so if you have any more problems, i am sure i can help... i have probably been there.
sTrYdR - PM me if you need any more advice.

[Avenged Sevenfold]

Thanks alot mate, that helps some, gives me some one to relate to.

I don't know, i guess i could go out with some other friends this week... But her best friends are my best friends and im not to fond of my other cirlce of friends but i guess i could give it a shot.

Il keep you posted.

A7X

[Dragar]

What does this thread talk about?

[Avenged Sevenfold]

What does this thread talk about?

Read the first page

[Reefern86]

Wow considering what this thread is about Im surprised its so big. LOL. I had a girlfriend until last week. Now Im free and single again. Sigh .... and I went through all that trobule to find a girlfriend in a school with a 3 guys to 1 girl ratio. Ohh, well back to work. ;)

[strydr]

Is it okay to feel as if you are not good enough for your partner, but knowing that you are good enough to yourself... like in my situation, i really love my girlfriend a lot, but lately i have been thinking why she chose me instead of this other guy, cause in my eyes i am the most boring person in this area, and besides that i am also so just a LOSER in my eyes... i am really just a fat dude, who eats a lot and doesnt even think about health or fitness --- i can think and be romantic but thats about all of it... WHY ME!! i dont understand... maybe i am not suppose to.
This girl i am dating, is a really smart and beautiful girl, who could probably have her pick of so many guys, yet she chose the dude, who is more likely to go to a Piano concert or a Jazz festival, than to be with her at the PARTY! also, who would want a fatish boyfriend at this age (15 - 18 years), WHO! i dont do much exercise, i just get fatter. I lost some weight last year, but now i am gaining again, and i am not learning my lesson... I LOVE FOOD! i aint gonna stop.
SO WHY! i mean she has so many guys that like her, and would probably go out with her every weekend to do what she WANTS to do, not the boring old CRAP that i go to... like the Planetarium, or for lunch, or just for a walk and talk --- i think that i am boring, i mean dont get me wrong i love to do my things, cause i love them, like the Planetarium... but which couple (shes 15 and me 17), would want to go there at that age... couples at this age do their own thing, mostly catch on a lot of crap, but damn, the frontier of physicalness is a holding of hands and just holding her in my arms... i mean COME ON! i am really slow, since we've been going out for 3 months and a bit, but i mean, why does she still stay with me... I feel completely in a total confusement... tell me why, maybe a girl could tell me, guys just tell me what the hell wHY!
sTrYdR in trouble...

[WizKid77]

The reason she's still with you, is because she CHOSE you for who you REALLY are. It's as simple as that. You're being to hard on yourself. You're obviously not boring to her if she's been with you for this long. So you have your own things you like to do, everyone does. Big deal that it's not what everyone else is doing now, but hey who the hell wants to jump on the band wagon anyway? I mean I'd rather be unique from everyone else and do my own thing. If everyone was doing the same things in life, damn this world would be boring and too conformed for my tastes. Life should be random, but simple. Random cause the occasional chaos is exciting. Simple because that's how life should be, people make it to complicated. So stop putting yourself down, you're just in a slump and have to cheer yourself out of it. A great person said once, "Don't put yourself down, cause it's the hardest thing to pull yourself up from". It was something around the lines of that. Anyway just calm down, relax, and do something that makes you happy to get your mind off these unnecessary thoughts.

[strydr]

I find it hard to ask her something like, "why are you with me" or " why me and not him" - cause that is how i feel about myself... I dont know why, but is it wrong to ask??
i am still gonna feel like this for some time... tell you guys later
sTrYdR

[WizKid77]

Honestly, I don't think there'll be any harm in asking that question. If you feel so hung up over this thing, it's prob worth asking then. She'll just tell you the truth and reassure you that she chose you for a reason.

Ok now it's time to talk about my dilemma. I've noticed I have to make a decision now. Ok you guys all know about the girl I've been talking about and sort of is with, correct? Ok her name's Carolyn btw, it'll make it easier if I told you guys her name. Ok anyway, I feel like we're having a lil falling out thing (which sux). The last time we really hung out was last Tues. during Spring Break. Now I've tried hanging out with her a bunch of times after that but either something gets messed up or she's busy. Like even when I've gone to her room there's always like something they're going to do at the moment and either they leave or need me to leave. It maybe just be honestly that she's busy and I just have crappy timing this week (which could very well be the case). Cause why I'm leaving she just has that loving smile on the entire time as the door closes and I walk down the hallway. It's the type of loving smile where it's like "I don't want to be away from you" sort of. You know what I'm talking bout. Anyway that's just how it's been. I kind of have this feeling like she doesn't really like me anymore (or possibly never did). Like I've met her brother and best friends from home, and they all love me apparently. And everyone in her suite seems to really love me as well, and think we're adorable when we're together. Now I think this is kind of the only reason she's kind of stuck with me for this long. You all know we're not really going out but we just really act like we are when we're together. I mentioned that mess here a while ago. Could I be right on this feeling? I mean it's kind of a terrible feeling and the idea really just sucks and hurts to think about. But hey what you guys think I should do about that?
Yeah there's more to all this as well. That was just the first part. I've noticed I haven't really been that good of a friend to this other girl I've been friends with for a while. Ok time for some back story. This girl is absolutely gorgeous. Her name's Antonia, and I've known her since like elementary school. Like we were always friends since then but towards the end of high school I really started to like her and we became pretty close friends. She kind of blew me off the entire summer though, which kind of bothered me. So during the beginning of the first semester here at college, I kind of blew her off and hung out with Carolyn a lot. Like every now and then she called me to go get dinner with her and couple of her friends and I'd go with them. Then one night we were hanging out and drinking. It was me, her, and one of our friends that we met different ways. Anyway she pretty much broke down crying (it was bad) and it was really hard for me to deal with seeing someone I envied so much to break down like that. So yeah I was really concerned about her and yeah I'd admit it I cried a lil bit. Anyway after that it was just really obvious that she liked me a lot because she found out I cared so much about her. But I dunno I was still tryin to get with Carolyn at the time. And Antonia hasn't really called me in a while, which I blame myself for, since I haven't really called her even when she went to the hospital (yeah I'm an asshole I guess). I really should've called her then. So I've been thinking I should meet up with her somewhere and apologize for being such a crappy friend lately. Now the only problem with that is I feel like we may try getting together then or something. But I'm not sure what's really going on w/ Carolyn at the moment. And if I did get together with Antonia that would ruin everything w/ Carolyn. Yeah I'm techniqually not going out w/ Carolyn and could see them both, but I feel it's really wrong to do that. It'll feel like I'm cheating on both of them and I couldn't bare to do that. And for some reason I'm just crazy for Carolyn despite the way she's treated me in the past and the present. So I would probably be better off w/ Antonia I guess. I feel like I'm pretty much stuck in situation Dante was in in "Clerks". And Silent Bob pretty much solved the problem by saying "You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you." I know that's pretty irrelevant, but that's the situation I feel like I may end up in. In which case, what the hell should I do? Go with the girl I'm crazy for, but treats me badly? Or the good girl? I know the choice sounds obvious but it's still bothering me.

[strydr]

dude, first things first... get it over and done with Carolyn. be serious about it, just walk up to her and ask her what is 'your' status, in this relationship. once you have got it over with Carolyn or just started, depending on the answer she gave you, then you should try to go for something with Antonia... she sounds really cool, plus you have known her all your life dude, there is nothing missing there, plus you have already felt so good for her, you might as well forget about the crazy one and go for the nice peaceful one... she would probably end up rocking your world anyway.
Dude, i think this could be your chance at a long serious relationship.
Apologize to Antonia, its the right thing to do.
sTrYdR

[Avenged Sevenfold]

dude, first things first... get it over and done with Carolyn. be serious about it, just walk up to her and ask her what is 'your' status, in this relationship. once you have got it over with Carolyn or just started, depending on the answer she gave you, then you should try to go for something with Antonia... she sounds really cool, plus you have known her all your life dude, there is nothing missing there, plus you have already felt so good for her, you might as well forget about the crazy one and go for the nice peaceful one... she would probably end up rocking your world anyway.
Dude, i think this could be your