renji rukia poem

[sto67]

i wrote this poem when i watched bleach and saw the flashback episode of renji and rukia. its also posted up on my Deviantart (http://sto67.deviantart.com), but i decided to share it with you guys :)
(ps. formatting is slightly off)

Howl

we howled at the stars we did-
we stared and bayed as the skies above
played eye-tricks with our mind;
playing hard to get and catch me if you can.
our cries reached the heavens
which gazed downwards at my humanity;
seeing fear of failure, fear of success,
fear
of fear.
each night we screamed together,
prideful, mindful of our endeavours
to catch the stars in the iris of our hearts;
longing for a better existence in the silver lining.
if only one of us were to reach the stars,
i would give my seat to her; my dreams
i would shout into the empty night,
illuminated by her comet tail's light.
like wild dogs wishing for the moon,
we were an inseparable pair; abandoned
binaries seeking a way home-
we
were.
we were all alone; our friends have left us.
we have each other; the stars
of course chose you, and i-
i couldnt be happier.
if only one of us were to reach the stars,
i would deny my chance to live,
and stay here with you; i have always bayed
my love for you.
i howled at the stars i did-
i stared and bayed to you above;
the stars played mind-tricks with my eyes,
it played with my heart-
but let us howl together once again,
even if we are
stars apart.

[Enkou Kitsune]

**wipes tear

That was good. Even though the lines didn't flow as well as I'd have hoped in a couple places, I think it captured the realationship between Rukia and Renji pretty well.

All in all, nice freestyle poem. Keep them coming... ^_^

[Byakuya7]

The flow was a bit akward but overall it was a great poem, you should post some more and keep practicing. I like how you showed how inseperable Renji and Rukia are, and in general their relationship toward one another. It was well done.